Embracing the Journey of Motherhood

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In a modestly appointed room, some participants perched on metal folding chairs while others sank into the worn floral upholstery reminiscent of the 1980s. As I surveyed the assembly of mothers, some cradling infants and others not, I found myself questioning my presence: “What am I doing here?” My gaze was drawn to a toddler, confidently navigating the space and periodically returning to her mother for a quick sip of breastmilk.

“It’s just a breast. Don’t gawk!” I mentally chastised myself. “It’s her choice to nurse her toddler, even if it makes me uncomfortable.” These thoughts swirled in my mind as I tried to suppress any judgment toward the mothers at this La Leche League meeting.

As a new mother seeking guidance on public nursing etiquette, I was navigating uncharted waters. At home, I had a baby boy, and breastfeeding was thankfully proceeding smoothly. However, each time I nursed him in public, self-doubt crept in, leading me to fumble nervously with my nursing cover in a desperate attempt to maintain modesty.

My professional background as a lawyer had conditioned me to a world of formality, and the candidness of motherhood—complete with discussions about breastfeeding and diaper dilemmas—felt foreign. Thankfully, my close friend accompanied me to this gathering (after some persuasion on my part), and as we walked to our cars afterward, I remarked, “Did you see the woman nursing that toddler? That’s unbelievable. I could never do that.”

Ah, the naïveté of my younger self; how little I understood. Today, I am a mother to three: a 6-year-old, a 4-year-old, and a 2-year-old (whom I am still nursing). That’s right; I have been breastfeeding continuously for the past six years, nursing through two pregnancies and tandem feeding my children—one on each side—before weaning my boys at around 3½ years old. Yes, I nursed my kids well past the age of three.

What’s more, I never subscribed to any extreme extended breastfeeding movement. I didn’t join any clubs advocating for preschoolers to be nursed, nor did I adhere to rigid parenting ideologies dictating how long a child should be breastfed. Quite frankly, I harbor a strong aversion to the so-called “mommy wars.” As long as a child receives nourishment in a healthy and appropriate manner, I’m supportive.

I’m just an ordinary mom, navigating the challenges of parenthood like everyone else. I never became a member of the La Leche League after attending just a couple of meetings. Instead, I simply do what works best for my family. And while you may not require validation, know that you have my encouragement to follow what suits your family best. Because whether you choose bottle or breast, you are the one who knows what’s right.

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Conclusion

In summary, the journey through motherhood is unique for each individual. Embracing what works for your family, free from judgment, is essential. Whether through breastfeeding or other means, the goal is to provide nurturing care for your children.

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