Recently, I discovered one of my twins, Leo, engaging in a rather unsanitary activity—playing in the toilet. Yes, there was urine involved. I quickly whisked him away, sanitized his hands, and we carried on with our evening.
A mere ten minutes later, I caught Leo indulging in a dirt snack from one of our houseplants. Once again, I scooped him up, and we resumed our night, undeterred.
I can only imagine the reactions of some observers: “Yikes! That child needs a bath!” or “Were you not watching him?” To which I would firmly respond, “Back off!”
Honestly, the reality of my parenting experience has been a constant struggle to keep afloat. For instance, I don’t lose my cool when one of them tumbles down (or, as it turns out, plays in toilet water). I’m not one to embrace Pinterest parenting; organic foods are not a staple in my home, and I rarely examine the labels on my children’s shampoo. When meal times roll around, I find myself in a frantic negotiation over dinner choices while hastily retrieving frozen meals from the freezer (thank goodness for microwaves!).
On school days, I’m rifling through their backpacks for homework just as the bus arrives, all the while trying to prevent my toddler from snatching dog food.
If you were to drop by unexpectedly, you’d find piles of clean laundry scattered across the couch, remnants of snacks strewn all over the kitchen counter (and likely nestled in between couch cushions). Homework would be chaotically spread throughout the living space—living room, dining room, kitchen, and anywhere else you could imagine. You’d spot dirty socks decorating the hallway and toothpaste inexplicably smeared on the bathroom wall. And toys? They’d be everywhere.
Let’s also acknowledge the fact that kids are inherently messy. I mean that quite literally. They are sticky, crusty, and, let’s face it, downright stinky. No matter how diligently I supervise them or attempt to maintain order, they seem to grow messier by the minute. That whole toilet and plant incident is just a minor detail in the grand scheme of things.
I recognize that some parents appear to have everything figured out. To them, I say, “Well done!” But my version of having it all together looks different. Despite the chaos and my laid-back approach, my family is filled with joy, and dare I say it, we are pretty “normal” (whatever that means).
My children laugh often. Our home may not resemble a pristine museum, but it’s a space where they create memories (and messes). I see a genuine happiness in them that simply can’t be fabricated. I do my best, and my kids are always well-dressed with combed hair. I don’t limit them to junk food, ensure their homework is completed, and most importantly, they know how to treat others with kindness and advocate for their beliefs. So, life isn’t merely a chaotic mess.
I thrive on procrastination and urgency—it’s just how I operate. However, if children reflect their upbringing, then mine are going to be filled with love and humor. While our life may resemble a segment from a sitcom like “The Middle,” I embrace it. We aren’t chasing perfection; we’re just trying to get through each day like everyone else.
If I achieve nothing else in life, I am confident that I have loved my children with all my heart. No amount of striving for perfection can overshadow that.
To all you parents out there just getting by like me, I applaud you. You have my understanding and support. Cherish those little ones, and they will return that love tenfold. Nothing compares to that—clean homes included.
And just for the record, Leo did take a bath that evening. We’re not total savages, after all.
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In summary, parenting is a beautiful mess. Embrace the chaos, love fiercely, and remember that perfection isn’t the goal.
Keyphrase: Parenting in chaos
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