Late at night, I find myself hunched over a scrap of paper in my daughter’s room, trying to write in a fairy-like script. It’s almost 11 p.m., and the note reads, “Keep playing the piano. You’re very talented. And I love the clothes you made for me.” I sign it with a flourish as “E” for Elara, a name I conjured up during a creative evening. After placing the note in the fairy house, I return to my room only to catch my husband’s skeptical gaze as he turns off the light. He doesn’t approve of my efforts to maintain this fantasy, and I can sense his reluctance in my insistence to uphold it.
In a world filled with wonder, my 9-year-old daughter believes in a host of imaginary beings: Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, leprechauns, and even our Elf on the Shelf named Benny. My husband has taken on these roles with a mix of excitement and begrudging acceptance. He once staged a hilarious scene where he pretended to be caught on camera as Santa reaching for cookies, and he’s always the one to slip money under pillows when teeth are lost. He has even relished the thought of what would happen if the Tooth Fairy and Benny crossed paths just before Christmas: chaos and a “turf war” of magical proportions.
However, Elara is a new addition to this realm of make-believe, emerging at a time when childhood beliefs are typically waning. My husband doesn’t recognize that Elara is here precisely because my daughter is approaching her tween years, a pivotal moment when the veil between childhood fantasy and adolescent skepticism thins.
As summer approached and my daughter began to navigate the complexities of growing up, I worried I was becoming that parent who inadvertently alienates her child. To create a space for open communication, I purchased a mother-daughter journal to facilitate our conversations without the usual misunderstandings. For a while, we exchanged notes—she wrote to me one day, and I replied the next.
Then, one day, after buying a pair of shoes, my daughter became enthralled with the shoebox they came in. “I want to make a fairy house,” she declared. Naturally, I encouraged her creativity. All children enjoy crafting, and her fascination with boxes has shown me how much money could have been saved if we had simply collected cardboard instead of toys.
While the journal sat unopened, her shoebox transformed into a wondrous creation filled with intricately cut windows, tiny chairs made from rolled tissues, and even miniature dresses hanging on little wire hangers. She left a heartfelt note inside, inviting Elara to visit, try on the clothes, and reveal her name. One night, I decided to encourage her imagination by having Elara respond in delicate, fairy-like writing.
Although my husband is not entirely supportive of this fantasy, research backs my approach to fostering belief in mythical figures. Jacqueline Woolley, a psychology professor at the University of Texas at Austin, noted in a Huffington Post article that exploring the line between possibility and impossibility fuels scientific discovery and innovation, from airplanes to the Internet.
In nurturing my daughter’s imagination, I’m cultivating a dreamer, and I cherish that. Yet, my motivations for preserving the Elara correspondence are, in many ways, self-serving. The notes exchanged are filled with warmth and encouragement—Elara seems to possess an almost magical insight into my daughter’s strengths and challenges as she navigates this confusing stage of life. As my daughter begins to distance herself from me, her connection with Elara remains strong, as if the fairy’s words hold more weight than mine.
I know that Elara, like Santa and the Easter Bunny, won’t be “real” forever. I’ve considered letting Elara take on more significant roles in my daughter’s life, such as imparting wisdom about personal growth or even offering gentle nudges about friendships and choices. However, I understand that eventually, my daughter will discover the truth, and I will transition back into the role of a mother, giving her advice and expressing my love in more straightforward terms.
Someday, when my daughter faces the bigger challenges of life, I’ll write her notes signed simply, “Mom.” Until that day comes, I will keep the magic alive. I will witness her joy as she discovers messages from a secret friend—one who is patient, understanding, and devoted to celebrating her achievements, turning the mundane into something extraordinary.
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In summary, fostering my daughter’s belief in fantasy beings like Elara allows for a unique bond between us, enhancing her confidence and creativity while allowing me to remain connected to her as she grows.
Keyphrase: nurturing childhood imagination
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