In the pursuit of raising considerate and well-mannered children, I strive to instill values that promote kindness and social awareness. I teach them to hold doors for others, assist those who drop their belongings, engage in conversations by making eye contact, express gratitude, and maintain cleanliness—especially in public spaces. I prioritize leading by example, but as my children grow older, they’re becoming increasingly aware of my occasional hypocrisy. Here are six ways in which I find myself contradicting my own teachings.
1. Cookie Dough Dilemma
I firmly prohibit my children from indulging in raw cookie dough because of the risk of salmonella from raw eggs. “It’s dangerous!” I insist. Yet, the truth is, I want to savor every last bite of that dough myself. Those extra morsels are a guilty pleasure I’m not willing to share.
2. The Truth About Honesty
I emphasize the importance of honesty and integrity, especially during conversations with their pediatrician. “Don’t lie,” I instruct, while simultaneously hoping they won’t disclose our frequent fast-food outings when questioned about their vegetable intake. In these moments, it’s more about discretion than deceit.
3. The Curse of Colorful Language
I discourage my children from using profanity, but in stressful situations, I sometimes let a few choice words slip. Like the time we found ourselves in a rundown motel during a storm, and I panicked when adult content blasted on the TV. My exclamation, “Get me out of this dump!” certainly wasn’t intended for their ears, but they found it amusing enough to repeat on our trip.
4. Screen Time Battles
I often lecture my kids about the dangers of excessive screen time, urging them to engage in physical activity instead. However, during long road trips, I find myself grateful for the peace that comes with their noses buried in tablets. It’s a delicate balance between what I advocate and what I allow for sanity’s sake.
5. Manners Matter—Except When They Don’t
I frequently remind my children about proper etiquette, from table manners to appropriate behavior in public settings. Yet, they catch me indulging in dessert without a care in the world, devouring chocolate cake over the sink as if it’s my last meal. My standards seem to waver when it comes to my own indulgences.
6. Dress Code Double Standards
I often tell my children to present themselves neatly when we go out, emphasizing the importance of looking tidy and put-together. However, here I am, still in my sweaty workout clothes after a long run, typing away rather than putting in the effort to dress nicely.
So, will I amend my ways to better align with the values I preach? Probably not. After all, I like the saying, “Do as I say, not as I do.” It’s a phrase I find myself leaning on more often than not, and it’s likely I’ll continue to do so.
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In summary, parenting is filled with contradictions, and despite my efforts to lead by example, I find myself navigating a world of double standards. The journey of raising children is complex and often messy, but it’s all part of the experience.
Keyphrase: contradictory parenting
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