From the moment my eldest child was born, we established a bedtime routine that incorporated every well-known method available: gentle nursing in soft lighting, soothing infant massage, and sweet lullabies. As he grew, we transitioned to reading bedtime stories, offering sips of water, and sharing prayers. By the time he reached the age of three, our routine had become quite elaborate, including games, songs, endless prayers, back scratches, and cuddles. Eventually, we simplified the process to just brushing teeth and saying prayers, realizing that the complex routine took far too much time.
However, the “second act” of bedtime commenced as soon as I kissed him goodnight, turned off the light, and stepped out. I would often find myself standing in the hallway, silently counting down from five, only to be met with a loud “Mom!” from the other side of the door.
“I need a drink of water,” my five-year-old would call out. “It’s right next to your bed,” I’d reply, kissing him once more before returning to the kitchen to tackle the dishes.
Little feet would pad down the hall, and moments later, he’d announce, “I need to go to the bathroom.” I would grant him permission, only to hear creaking floorboards signaling his return. “What now?” I’d ask, growing increasingly irritable. “The fan is blowing on my feet,” he would respond, prompting me to go back into his room to tuck him in again, ensuring he was just warm enough without getting tangled in his blanket.
With a final kiss and a heartfelt goodnight, I would retreat to the kitchen, only for the tranquility to be shattered again half an hour later. Suddenly, a small face would appear over my chair, startling me. “I forgot to tell you something,” he’d say, catching me off guard. I’d respond with a firm, “Get back into bed!” Sometimes this would end the cycle, but on difficult nights, the back-and-forth could persist for up to two hours.
Could There Be a Solution?
Research suggests there might be: a “sleep pass” system, similar to a hall pass for school, that allows children to leave their beds for specific needs without constant interruptions. Dr. Emily Smith, a psychologist at the Family Wellness Center, conducted a study using a 5-by-7-inch card that permitted children one exit from their beds each night. This pass could be used for bathroom trips, drinks of water, or even a quick cuddle. Once they used it, they were expected to remain in bed, even if they vocalized their need for further attention. The results were promising—crying and nighttime wanderings dropped to zero in her study, and subsequent research confirmed these findings across larger groups.
As noted in a recent article, “The beauty of the pass is that it gives parents and kids an element of control in what frequently is an out-of-control, emotional situation.” Children gain reassurance knowing they can leave their rooms once, while parents appreciate the clarity it provides, allowing them to keep the door closed thereafter.
I’m eager to try this strategy tonight. If it can curb the bedtime disruptions, I’m all in. This approach not only aims to create a more peaceful evening for me but also ensures my son gets the rest he desperately needs. Perhaps contemplating whether to use the pass will be just boring enough to encourage him to drift off to sleep.
Additional Resources
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In summary, the sleep pass method offers a potential solution to bedtime struggles, promoting a more peaceful environment for both children and parents alike.
Keyphrase: Sleep Pass Strategy for Bedtime
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