In my robust 20s, I wasn’t the type to spend countless hours at the gym, only to scrutinize my reflection for “flaws.” Not that I don’t have them. I’ve always carried a little extra around my midsection, had thick thighs, and arms that jiggle a bit. My breasts have been asymmetrical for as long as I can remember. My physique could never be called toned, slim, or even remotely stunning.
I’ve never been blessed with a remarkable body or a glamorous face. Growing up with three brothers, I truly appreciated the fact that I never felt the urge to chase after those ideals. Being ordinary has turned into a blessing for me.
This body—my body—has always served a purpose. Its height helped me excel at competitive tennis, its stamina saw me through sleepless nights finishing my thesis just before the deadline, and its strength managed to haul all my belongings up three flights of stairs to my first apartment in the city that never sleeps. It has fought off everything from the common cold to more severe health challenges. Since I’ve freed myself from the burden of obsessing over how I look, I can instead celebrate all that it can do.
I’ve never been one to fuss over my hair or makeup. In fact, on my wedding day, I spent less than two hours preparing. The simple dress that draped over my shoulders cost under $100. Instead of hiring a fancy photographer, I enlisted a co-worker known for his edgy work with tattooed models to capture the day in a way that felt more like a rock concert than a traditional ceremony.
When I flip through those photos, I see my upper arms pressed against my husband’s in ways that aren’t exactly flattering. Yet, in the very next shot, those same strong arms are lifting him up in laughter, thanks to the help of my brothers. Rather than focusing on posing my average body in the best light, I relished the cake and danced until my sturdy thighs couldn’t take it anymore.
When I found out I was expecting, everyone warned me about the impending changes to my body. “Lather on the lotion to avoid stretch marks. Don’t gain more than 15 pounds, or you’ll regret it. Enjoy that luscious hair and those firm breasts while you can.” Fast forward through two C-sections, 70 pounds of pregnancy weight, and 35 months of breastfeeding, and here I am. My belly still isn’t flat, my upper arms still jiggle, and my thighs are as thick as ever. The only thing that’s been “banging” lately is my forehead on the table when my toddler refuses to eat the chicken nuggets he insisted on just moments prior.
But guess what? My body still functions as I need it to. I may not be the quiet type, but I can effortlessly carry a 35-pound child in one arm and a 25-pound child in the other, all while managing a diaper bag loaded with milk, grapes, and enough bubbles for a small party. I can balance a bike and a toddler while pulling a wagon full of groceries uphill.
So what if my belly wasn’t flat before kids? It’s still not. I’ve gained nothing but more perspective. Yes, I shower less frequently and wear even less makeup than in my younger days, but I honestly don’t miss those things. There’s no reason to mourn my pre-baby body. As far as I can tell, I still have it.
It’s a true luxury to not compare my body or face to anyone else’s. To any woman contemplating motherhood, I urge you to embrace your own averageness. If your hair wasn’t voluminous and shiny before the whirlwind of pregnancy hormones, it’s unlikely to magically transform afterward. If gravity has never treated your breasts kindly, you won’t be surprised to find you still need a bra after nursing.
Let go of those expectations and appreciate the incredible things your body has done. You’re about to embark on the journey of motherhood, and your body will rise to the occasion. That’s anything but average.
For more on the journey to motherhood, check out our article on home insemination kits and discover ways to boost your fertility with supplements. If you’re considering in vitro fertilization, the Mayo Clinic offers excellent resources.
Summary:
This article discusses the freedom and empowerment that comes from embracing one’s body, especially in the context of motherhood. It highlights the importance of recognizing the body’s abilities over its appearance and encourages women to appreciate their unique journeys rather than comparing themselves to societal ideals.
Keyphrase: embrace your body
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