Why We Should Delay College Until Kids Are 30

pregnant woman in yellow flower dress holding her bellylow cost ivf

The U-Haul is parked in the driveway, filled to the brim with clothes, books, and furniture. My husband and I stand hand in hand, watching it as if it’s somehow alive and glowing. While I stay rooted in place, my mind races—my heart has already taken flight, soaring through the clouds and back down again, almost crashing.

Are we really prepared to let her go?

Our daughter, now 18, is getting ready for her journey from Austin to Los Angeles. She’s chosen to take a gap year before heading off to college, diving into an internship while living independently. The whirlwind of emotions I’m experiencing—excitement, anxiety, curiosity, happiness, and fear—feels overwhelming; it deserves its own name.

Amidst this chaos, a few questions echo in my mind:

  • How is this even allowed? We’re actually letting an 18-year-old live on their own?
  • What does she know about the world? She can’t even load the dishwasher!
  • How will she manage her finances?
  • How can she excel in a job or school when she hasn’t figured out her path yet?
  • Isn’t 30 a more sensible age to be making these decisions?

Did I prepare her enough?

Did I read the right parenting books? Did I ignore the misguided advice in others? Did I offer enough support and guidance without stifling her? Did I teach her about relationships? Did I remind her to be cautious on tricky left turns? Did I instill in her the value of hard work, whether or not she wins? Have I helped her understand self-worth?

Will she thrive?

Will she forge friendships? Will she find joy in her work? Will she stay safe while navigating the chaotic L.A. traffic? Will she call a ride service when needed? Will she hold firm to her beliefs while remaining open to growth? Will she discover her passions, making her daily life more meaningful? Will she experience love and connection?

As my husband and I hold hands in the driveway, our daughter returns from an errand in his car. The U-Haul has positioned my vehicle awkwardly, leading her to misjudge the turn, resulting in a fender-bender. In that moment, my husband and I exchange a knowing glance, embracing tightly.

This overwhelming blend of emotions—yes, it’s familiar. It reminds me of bringing my newborns home from the hospital. Although I missed this experience with my stepdaughter, the same mix of feelings flooded back when I buckled her younger sisters into their car seats. I wondered then: How is this legal? Will I be enough for them?

Being a parent—that’s what this feeling is called. It’s the sensation of your heart residing outside your body, living within another. It’s the realization that, no matter how much you love them, they are their own individuals. Each day from their birth is a bittersweet love story intertwined with letting go. It’s a bond deeper than any other—perhaps only rivaled by marriage.

This wasn’t the first accident for my husband’s car, and soon we’ll be searching for a new one, preferably not one that’ll be driven by a teenager! At least there are some perks to this transition.

For more insightful discussions on family life and preparing for the future, check out our blog post on home insemination kits, which can be a helpful resource for parents-to-be. Also, if you’re interested in more information about fertility options, visit the excellent resource on in-vitro fertilization (IVF).

In summary, the journey of parenting is filled with a whirlwind of emotions as we guide our children into adulthood. While the challenges may seem daunting, each experience is a step toward independence.

Keyphrase: parenting challenges

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