Alright, moms, it’s time we talk about the quirks of our bodies that have become the latest internet obsessions. We’ve tackled the thigh gap and the bikini bridge, and now we’re confronted with yet another ridiculous body feature: the thighbrow. Seriously, who has the time to obsess over this? Oh, right—celebs like the Kardashians.
The term #Thighbrow originated from a slideshow on Elle questioning, “Are Thighbrows the New Thighgap?” Why, I ask, are we still dissecting women’s bodies? Can we please stop inventing trends that scrutinize how our bodies look? Before I dive deeper into my rant, let’s clarify what a thighbrow actually is. Imagine wearing a Jane Fonda-style high-cut bathing suit. Now, kneel and lean forward slightly. If you have the thighbrow, congratulations! You’ve mastered the art of looking like a Kardashian. But honestly, who cares? My thighs just look like, well, thighs. As mothers, we have far more important things to focus on than this nonsense.
But hey, there are definitely some hashtags we should be embracing as moms! Our eyebrows might not be #onfleek, but our chin hair #needsplucking and there’s a lot more to celebrate:
- #Fupa – Many of us are all too familiar with this post-birth reality: the Fat Upper Pussy Area. Let’s get this trending so we can stop feeling judged when we rock our bikinis. FUPAs unite!
- #PoopNail – For those of us changing diapers and unknowingly collecting remnants under our nails, this hashtag is for you. Own that #poopnail until you can scrub it away, because honestly, it’s just another person’s poop.
- #VomitLocks – If you’ve got a baby with reflux, you know the struggle of not having time for multiple showers a day (let’s be real—if you get one shower in, that’s a win). Let’s make #vomitlocks a trendy badge of honor. What if we showcased a mom with #vomitlocks lounging on a yacht? Now that could go viral!
- #MilkSpill – Whether your baby is on breastmilk or formula, it’s likely that you’ve left the house with milk stains on your shirt—probably more than once. Let’s normalize milk spills and make them part of the fashion statement.
- #FancyLeggings – Got a night out planned but not back to your pre-baby weight? Forget about pants with buttons; #fancyleggings are your best friend. Pair them with a flowy top, and voilà—you’re ready to hit the town!
- #YesterdaysEyeliner – We’ve all been there, right? You fell asleep without washing your face, and suddenly you need to look presentable for the pediatrician. #YesterdaysEyeliner is a time-saver and a necessity when you wake up late because, of course, today is the day your baby finally lets you sleep in.
So there you have it! While we may not be participating in the latest ridiculous Instagram body trends, we’re definitely keeping up in our own, wonderfully chaotic way. And honestly, our hashtags are way more relatable.
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Summary: This article humorously discusses the absurdity of current body trends while promoting relatable hashtags that moms can embrace, such as #MilkSpill and #VomitLocks. It encourages moms to celebrate their realities and offers useful links for those interested in home insemination.
Keyphrase: mom hashtags
Tags: [“home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”]