As someone who thrives at night, I’ve always found my energy peaking when the rest of the world is winding down. My internal clock isn’t exactly aligned with the typical 9-to-5 hustle; I find myself settling down around 2 a.m. and rising at 10 a.m. During my single days, I gravitated towards jobs that started later. However, kids don’t care about your late-night habits. I’m not alone in this; many parents out there have shared their struggles with waking up at the crack of dawn, a sight they’d never seen pre-kids. Here are 18 truths that resonate with fellow night owl parents.
- If you’re fortunate, you married an early riser. This way, you can tag-team the night shifts, with the night owl handling the late feeding while the early bird takes the morning shift.
- If you’re not so lucky, you’ve partnered with another night owl. You’ll both find yourselves bleary-eyed at the 2 a.m. feeding, grumbling at one another, “You should really be the one to sleep!”
- You might spend thousands child-proofing your home, turning your living room into a soft fortress. This way, you can catch brief naps on the couch while your little one plays at 6 a.m. until they inevitably find something to shove in your mouth. Totally worth it.
- “Go to sleep!” you chastise yourself at 2 a.m. as you scroll through your phone, with the kids having drifted off hours ago.
- Yet, those late-night hours are precious. You’re alone, the world is quiet, and you can chat with distant friends or binge-watch nostalgic shows like “Mork and Mindy.”
- When it’s your partner’s turn to sleep in, and they request coffee in bed, you might accidentally spill some of that lukewarm brew on them as you hand over the cup.
- You play a mental game of “would you rather?” Would you prefer being woken three times a night but get to sleep until 8 a.m., or enjoy a full eight hours but rise at 5:30? The answer is moot because who can actually fall asleep by 9:30 anyway?
- School starts way too early.
- Where do these moms with perfectly styled hair and fresh faces come from? Aren’t they supposed to be in yoga pants and flip-flops?
- When the sign-up sheet for parent-teacher conferences has slots from 7:05 a.m. to 8:10 a.m., you can’t help but scribble, “LOL WHO CARES!?” on it.
- After finally enjoying a night out with old friends, you find yourself thinking, “I should do this more often!” that is until the wake-up call for breakfast cuts through your blissful rest.
- When it’s your spouse’s turn to tend to the baby, and they ignore the cries, having to nudge them awake qualifies as grounds for divorce.
- The most brutal mornings are when the kids wake you up on a day off.
- You become fixated on whose turn it is to wake up.
- You dream of having your own space where you can rise at your own pace, fueled by coffee. A mother-in-law suite would suffice, or even a tiny room where no one can disturb you with Cheerios on your forehead as you sleep. Fine, even a closet with an air mattress would do. Just a little morning solitude, please.
- Being jolted awake feels akin to a lazy fish being yanked from a warm stream into a chaotic, cold world.
- You find yourself crafting various metaphors to express the pain of early awakenings.
- You wonder, how young is too young for your child to whip up breakfast? Five? Six? Kids heal fast, right?
Currently, my internal clock is a mess; I sometimes wake up before my kids, despite my best efforts to sleep in. But surely, this phase won’t last forever. Eventually, they’ll dress themselves and get off to school, and then I can seek out a job with a late start.
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Summary:
Night owl parents face unique challenges, battling early mornings and sleepless nights. From navigating the parenting dynamics with an equally nocturnal partner to dreaming of a peaceful morning routine, these insights capture the humorous and relatable struggles of raising kids while embracing a night owl lifestyle.
Keyphrase: Night Owl Parents
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