Lisa draws comparisons between the isolation experienced by contemporary mothers and that of the housewives of the 1960s, both feeling trapped in unfulfilling roles. However, she argues that housewives had it better, as their domestic efforts were more readily acknowledged. Today’s mothers are expected to juggle multiple roles: caregiver, homemaker, and professional, often feeling like a failure if they can’t excel at all.
While I resonate with some of these observations, I think Lisa misses a crucial point about how motherhood has evolved in recent decades. She notes the shift from women identifying primarily as housewives to viewing themselves as mothers, yet she doesn’t delve deeply into what that truly means today. Motherhood now feels all-consuming, unlike in the past.
We exist in an era of intensive parenting, where mothers are pressured to devote themselves entirely to their children’s needs. Whether aiming for prestigious schools or embracing a more holistic parenting style—carrying babies in slings or co-sleeping—these demands require immense time and energy, leaving little room for friendships or connections beyond the family unit.
Modern parenting is also steeped in individualism and competition. Each family, often led by the mother, is held solely accountable for raising their children into responsible adults. While this empowerment sounds appealing, it becomes overwhelming when one realizes the weight of such responsibility, particularly without support from extended family or community resources.
This is why we romanticize motherhood, portraying it as the most rewarding job in the world. A blog post titled “Are You Lonely, Mama?” garnered significant attention, reflecting the prevalent notion that while motherhood can be isolating and challenging, it’s just a phase to endure, considered by many as the most sacred period of life.
In truth, the loneliness that accompanies motherhood should not be normalized. My own journey as a new mother was riddled with isolation, a reality I still face. But here’s the thing: Motherhood shouldn’t be a lonely path.
Lisa’s article stops short of providing solutions, advocating only for more flexible work environments. I don’t hold all the answers either, but I can share this: a personal crisis involving law enforcement opened my eyes to the importance of seeking help.
Even though modern parenting often discourages collaboration among parents, we should embrace the idea of reaching out for assistance and extending our hands to others. A simple act of kindness can have a profound impact. When we ask, “Are you lonely, Mama?” let’s not just commiserate. Instead, let’s inquire, “How can I help you?”
This article was initially published on Aug. 5, 2015.
For those exploring the journey of parenthood, whether through traditional means or home insemination, resources like Nichd.nih.gov offer valuable insights. If you’re interested in home insemination kits, check out Make A Mom for helpful products, or explore Couples Fertility Journey for expert advice.
Summary:
Motherhood today is marked by intensified expectations and profound loneliness, a reality that should not be accepted as the norm. While the article reflects on the challenges faced by mothers, it calls for a shift in perspective—encouraging support and connection rather than isolation.
Keyphrase: Motherhood Loneliness
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