As a new parent, I frequently hear the well-meaning advice to “sleep when the baby sleeps” and “let the housework slide.” This last phrase, akin to “a messy home is a happy home,” suggests that by neglecting the chores, we can focus on more meaningful moments with our little ones—spending time rolling on the floor with giggling toddlers or enjoying the sounds of the garbage truck outside. The idea is that a little mess will allow us to prioritize what truly matters: our children and the fleeting years we have with them.
For me, this notion is utterly misguided.
First off, where exactly is this housework supposed to slide to? If you’re reasonably organized and not overly meticulous, there’s hardly any wiggle room. Dirty dishes will still need to be scrubbed before they can hold food again. Sure, you could wash each dish as you use it, saving time on cupboard doors, but those few seconds saved are overshadowed by the struggle of cleaning stuck-on food instead of simply rinsing it off. Similarly, while you could pull clothes straight from the laundry pile, they still need washing and drying, and digging through them takes time.
Even if procrastination reduced the immediate burden, the sight of unfinished chores would only add to my stress, thanks to the broken windows theory. Although this idea has faced criticism in political circles, it holds true at home. A sink filled with dirty dishes and overflowing laundry hampers breeds chaos, encouraging further neglect. The more cluttered the space, the more likely we are to toss aside our trash and other messes, contributing to the disorder. In essence, letting housework pile up is like physics; it accumulates, adding weight to my mental load.
Moreover, the presence of unfinished tasks can derail my ability to relax. I’ve never enjoyed study breaks or lengthy lunches because I find it hard to unwind with unfinished business nagging at me. I may think I can clean the kitchen after breakfast and then enjoy a round of “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star,” but I can’t truly be present when my eyes keep drifting to the wadded paper towels and apple cores nearby. A quick two-minute cleanup allows me to embrace the moment, leaving me free to sing and dance without distractions.
Recently, I’ve also questioned the assumed relationship between housework and parental engagement. When we visualize a parent tidying up while their children play, it’s easy to think that the focus on chores hampers connection. But, in fact, when the chaos of parenting becomes overwhelming—especially with three kids demanding attention—I find solace in completing small, manageable tasks. Organizing socks or sorting toys becomes a way to regain control and calm in the midst of the whirlwind. Once I’ve put the laundry in order, I can truly enjoy the moments with my kids.
Letting the housework slide would simply mean passing the burden to my future self, creating unnecessary stress and taking away a valuable coping mechanism. So, for now, I’ll keep up with the chores and let the advice to let it slide drift away instead.
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In summary, managing household tasks is not just about cleanliness; it’s about maintaining my mental well-being and enjoying the time I have with my family. By staying on top of chores, I create a more peaceful environment that allows me to engage fully in the joyful chaos of parenthood.
Keyphrase: Housework and Parenting
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