Teaching my young teenage daughter how to be a “sister” is one of my most important roles as a parent. Sisterhood is about uplifting one another. These are the girls—and eventually women—who cultivate meaningful friendships and support each other. Here’s how I’m guiding my daughter to become that invaluable friend, the sister-friend:
1. Emergency Essentials
No woman can go it alone. Middle school marks the onset of many surprises, including the arrival of a girl’s period—often at the most inconvenient times. I prepared my daughter with a small survival kit tucked into a discreet makeup bag. This kit includes pads, a couple of tampons, wipes, and a travel-sized deodorant. I encouraged her to offer these supplies to anyone in need, even if they aren’t close friends. It’s about being bold and compassionate; after all, you can always restock the supplies later.
2. Stick Together
When you’re at a party or waiting outside for a ride, never leave a fellow girl behind. Unfortunately, the world can be unpredictable, and it’s safer to stay together. Ensure your friends are secure before parting ways, which means not leaving them with someone you merely think is trustworthy. Safety should always come first—this means waiting until they’re picked up by a parent or an older sibling, or going home together. Remember, you and your friends are a team. If they stay, you stay. Even if the boy you like is giving your friend attention, her safety is always the priority. I’ll never forget the day I let a friend slip away with a guy, only to have a bad feeling that prompted me to check on her. Thankfully, I arrived just in time to help.
3. Avoid Rivalry
While some competition is natural—like vying for a spot on a sports team—don’t let it extend to boys. When you’re 14, chances are he’s not your future husband. The bond you share with your girlfriend will last much longer than a fleeting teenage crush. If a friend develops a connection with someone you like, step back graciously. It’s natural to feel hurt, but maintaining your friendship is more valuable. And if he tries to pursue you later, it’s a clear sign he’s not worth your time.
4. Prioritize Friendships
When you find yourself in a relationship, make sure to carve out time for your friends. It’s easy to get swept away in romance, but your girlfriends need to know they’re still important. Remember, when relationships end, your friends will be there to support you.
5. Be There
When a friend reaches out at 3 a.m., pick up that phone. You’d want her to do the same for you. And let’s face it, your smartphone is probably within arm’s reach anyway.
The middle and high school years can be a rollercoaster ride filled with challenges and triumphs. What better way for our daughters to thrive than to nurture a circle of girlfriends who celebrate their achievements and provide support during tough times? By instilling these values, we’ll help them grow into strong, supportive women—sisters in spirit.
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Summary: Teaching your daughter the importance of sisterhood involves guiding her to be a reliable friend, emphasizing empathy, loyalty, and support. By fostering these traits, she can develop strong, meaningful relationships with other women.
Keyphrase: sister-friendship
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