I’m in a relationship with a man who has a rather impressive amount of hair. When we first crossed paths, the first thing that caught my eye was his towering height—definitely attractive. Next, there was his behind—very appealing. But then I noticed the hair; while he was mostly furry, his arms were oddly bare. Curious, I soon discovered that he had been shaving his forearm hair, but not frequently enough, leaving behind a perpetual stubble. Apparently, a misguided ex had convinced him that his hairy arms were unattractive, and he took her advice to heart. My first mission as his girlfriend? To put an end to that nonsense.
I’m quite fond of hairiness; it exudes masculinity in my eyes. There’s something endearing about being scooped up and carried down the hall by my furry partner, who is grunting under my weight. I appreciate the warmth he provides, and I find comfort in running my fingers through his fur—yes, it’s true!
However, sharing a life with a hairy guy comes with its own set of challenges, particularly when it comes to managing his abundant body hair. For instance, belly button lint is a real issue. My partner tends to collect a surprising amount of lint in his belly button, which he eventually pulls out and… casually tosses to the floor. The little balls of hair and lint tumble around our home like lost tumbleweeds.
Our kids often scream, “WHAT IS THAT THING?!” while clinging to me, and I calmly reassure them, “It’s just another clump of Daddy’s belly button lint.” After a snuggle session, I find chest and arm hair stuck to our babies, and I quietly pick it off their faces. I think to myself: It’s not his fault he’s hairy. He doesn’t mean to share his fur with the kids. Maybe it was a full moon last night? I shed hair all over the place too—long, blonde strands that I don’t even notice. Does anyone else have this problem? Ugh, the struggles are real!
After cuddling with him, I occasionally find his hair stuck to my clothes. Our lint trap is constantly full, and there’s always stray hair in the bathroom sink and bathtub. I expected that much. What I didn’t see coming were the rare yet memorable manscaping blunders. Thankfully, they don’t happen often, but when they do… oh boy.
Not long ago, I was in our home office typing away when I noticed him peeking around the doorway, shirtless. I didn’t think much of it until he stepped fully into view. “I need your help with something,” he said, and I focused my attention on him.
“I was shaving my head, you know, like I usually do, and when I was doing my neck, the razor slipped,” he explained as he mimicked the motion. “And then… well, this happened.” He turned around to reveal a shocking sight.
I gasped. It appeared as if he was wearing a hair-styled off-the-shoulder shirt. “The razor slipped, so I tried to fix it. Can you help?” he pleaded.
I sat there, frozen in disbelief and horror. I couldn’t laugh or speak; I was entranced by the absurdity of it all. There was no fixing this unless he was willing to go for a full-body shave and start anew. I couldn’t help but admire the way his hair fluffed up from his upper arms—like makeshift shoulder pads.
If I were to write a book titled The Woman’s Handbook for Coexisting with a Hairy Partner, it would be brief and to the point: Do not hesitate. Shave him down pronto. And that would be that.
For more on navigating the joys of parenthood, check out our post on home insemination kits, which offers insight into starting your family. Also, explore this at-home insemination kit for comprehensive options in your journey. For additional information on pregnancy and fertility, Cleveland Clinic’s podcast is an excellent resource.
In summary, living with a hairy partner can be both delightful and chaotic. Embrace the quirks, tackle the hair situations head-on, and don’t forget to laugh!
Keyphrase: Living with a hairy partner
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