Planning a wedding? Forget the fuss of organizing a traditional bridal shower—why not just send out cards requesting cash instead? Recently, a Reddit user shared an invitation her friend received for a so-called “quiet bridal shower.” This concept seems to be gaining traction. I always thought bridal showers were charming gatherings filled with sandwiches and heartfelt gifts, but apparently, that’s not the case anymore.
The invitation read: “Join us for a Quiet Shower! No party, no guests, no bride, and no wrapped gifts. Simply purchase a shower card, include a check made out to [insert names], and mail it in the provided envelope. All envelopes will be collected and sent to the happy couple.”
Asking for checks in lieu of gifts stretches the term “celebrate” to its limit. This sounds less like a celebration and more like a bill payment. Traditionally, there’s an implied understanding that wedding guests will give gifts to the couple, but the key word here is “implied.” It’s not a demand, and the expectation should never be overtly stated.
Social customs exist for a reason, and we have long maintained the pretense that showers are joyous occasions. If you’re inviting people to your wedding, they’re already aware that a gift is customary; there’s no need to make a formal request. Weddings are becoming increasingly expensive—not just for the couple but for their guests as well. Many couples are investing heavily in their big day, leading to a sense of entitlement regarding gifts or cash in return.
Sending a letter that says “please send checks” feels just plain strange. It conveys, “I don’t want to go through the trouble of planning a bridal shower or setting up a registry, but I still expect your money.” Quite the turn-off, if you ask me.
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To summarize, the notion of a “silent bridal shower” challenges traditional wedding customs by outright requesting cash, diminishing the celebratory nature of the occasion. It raises eyebrows and makes one wonder about the future of wedding etiquette.
Keyphrase: “quiet bridal showers”
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