Let’s be real: as moms, we inevitably size each other up. Whether we’re at the playground, waiting for the school bell to ring, or mingling at a school event, it’s hard to resist the urge to assess the other mothers around us. It’s part of our nature! We observe, sense, feel, and yes, we definitely judge.
Thanks to the well-known Myers-Briggs personality framework, which categorizes individuals into 16 distinct personality types, you can stop wondering, “Is she the one I should ask for help with School Spirit Day?” or “Why does she make me feel so uneasy?” We know you’re busy—after all, you’re a mom! So, let’s simplify things. No need for the formal MBTI assessment; just browse this list, identify yourself, your friends, and the mom who makes you want to duck behind the nearest tree when she walks by.
INFJ (Into Nourishing Foods/Juicing)
You’re more organic than a farmer’s market. Your child greets everyone with a cheery “Namaste” instead of a simple “hello.” Plus, your Birkenstocks are totally back in style.
ISFP (Instagramming Fitness Moments)
You’re always decked out in activewear. Just two weeks post-baby number four, you’re posting bikini selfies with the caption: “What’s your excuse?” Seriously, just stop.
ESFP (Extra Sulky at PTA Meetings)
You dominate conversations and challenge every decision. After meetings, you corner parents, just as they’re dreaming of a relaxing evening with a glass of wine. You know who you are.
ISTJ (Insults Staff, Then Judges)
You’re the one griping to the office staff about your kid missing out on the lunchtime enrichment program, even though you forgot to submit the paperwork. Nice try placing the blame on them.
ESTJ (Earnest Spirit Through Jesus)
You’re the cheerful mom driving that big American SUV with a giant cross hanging from the rearview mirror. Your fifth-grade daughter is known for cornering younger kids and sharing overly graphic tales.
INFP (Intellectually Exhausted from Parenting)
Bless your heart. With a newborn and twin boys in kindergarten, you haven’t showered in days—let alone caught up on the news. You’ve completely lost track of your name, the current year, and what it’s like to have uninterrupted sleep.
ESTP (Earning Big Bucks)
Your Christian Louboutin heels cost more than your child’s teacher’s used Honda. You whisk your kids away to Vail or St. Barts a week before school breaks. And somehow, your skin looks fabulous despite the sun exposure.
INTJ (Into Nothing, Completely Jaded)
You’re the queen of eye rolls. Helping with the school fundraiser? No, thank you. You’re often overheard dropping expletives within earshot of impressionable kids.
ENFP (Endless scrolling through social media)
Hey, mama! Look up from your iPhone! Your kid is literally eating dirt right now.
INTP (Irritatingly Anxious About Playdates)
We get it: your child has a peanut allergy and is gluten-free. His EpiPen is stashed safely in his bag. And yes, we promise, no one is taking him anywhere. We also ensure all our guns are locked away.
ENTP (Edgy-Negative Mom on the Playground)
You’re still rocking those purple Doc Martens and vintage Nirvana tees, though you haven’t seen a concert in nearly two decades and have a noticeable muffin top. You’re just too cool for school.
ISFJ (Internet-Surfing Freelance Writer)
Translation: You show up in shorts and flip-flops for pick-up and drop-off. Also, you casually mention “deadlines” that keep you from volunteering in class. Ever.
ENTJ (Eating—NOT!!/Tennis/Junior League)
Your priorities, in order. You sometimes condescendingly critique J.Crew’s vanity sizes for not being true to a size 0.
ENFJ (Everywoman Never Feeling Stressed!)
You work long hours, bake cookies at 1 a.m. for the next day’s sale, and still squeeze in Pilates twice a week. Coffee fuels your life, and your kids totally adore you. You make the rest of us feel a bit inadequate.
ISTP (Inspires Student Toilet Papering)
You’re the parent that local high schoolers love to prank at 2 a.m., armed with a Costco-sized stash of Charmin Ultra Soft. Don’t pretend you aren’t aware of this.
ESFJ (Engaging, Smart, Funny, Joyful)
You’re the elusive mom friend everyone is on the lookout for at school—kind of like Sasquatch or UFOs. Rarely seen but often discussed.
(For the record, I identify as a mix between INTP and ISFJ.)
This article was originally published on May 15, 2015.
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In summary, whether you’re the yoga-loving mom, the PTA powerhouse, or the weary parent just trying to survive, there’s a Myers-Briggs type that fits you. Discovering your type can provide some insight into your parenting style and how you connect with other moms.
Keyphrase: Myers-Briggs School Mom Types
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