“I’d do just about anything for a getaway,” is a sentiment I’ve heard from countless mothers. And honestly, who can blame them? Whether they’re juggling a career or managing their household full-time, moms everywhere, myself included, crave a breather from the whirlwind of daily life. After all, we all recognize that our fellow moms are navigating the same challenges, so what better way to unwind than with a girls’ weekend escape?
When I first brought up the idea with my husband, he responded, “That sounds great! You deserve some time off. Go enjoy yourself with your friends.” Thrilled, I crafted a message to my girlfriends, detailing the plans for our weekend: spa treatments, lounging by the pool, heartfelt conversations, and of course, plenty of wine.
However, my enthusiasm quickly faded upon reading their replies.
- “I wish I could, but I’ve never spent a night away from Max. I just can’t imagine it.”
- “That sounds amazing, but I don’t want to be apart from the kids.”
- “Leaving my little one overnight might be too hard. Can we just do dinner?”
- “Oh, I could never leave my kids for a whole weekend. Sorry!”
Suddenly, my dreams of a fun-filled getaway with cherished friends dissipated, leaving me questioning my own maternal instincts and priorities.
Guilt began to creep in. Is it wrong that I long for a two-day break from my kids? Should I really want to be with them every single moment? Am I less devoted than my friends?
Let me clarify: I’m not seeking a monthly escape, but a yearly one? Absolutely.
Among all the reasons I could have for not taking that girls’ trip, I never anticipated that I wouldn’t have anyone willing to join me. I figured time constraints, budget issues, or childcare would be the common hurdles for many mothers. Yet, I had the time (thanks to a long weekend off work), the funds (which I had been saving), and reliable childcare (an amazing partner).
One friend went further, stating, “I honestly don’t know any other moms who would feel okay leaving their kids for a weekend.” Ouch.
It seemed I was not only an outlier in my small circle of mom friends but a rarity among mothers everywhere. Talk about a wave of parental shame. Add in the societal pressure to be the perfect parent, and it’s enough to make anyone second-guess their choices.
Soon, my self-interrogation gave way to defensiveness. I love my kids, just as much as any other mom. In fact, when I’ve managed to take a night away, I’ve often shed a tear while leaving and spent the entire time thinking of them.
Having differing views on parenting does not make any of us bad mothers; it simply highlights that what works for one may not work for another. It’s all too easy to jump to conclusions about hot-button parenting issues. Labeling women as overprotective or anxious only adds more guilt to mothers who are already navigating the turmoil of raising children.
As much as I cringe when someone remarks, “I can’t believe you can be away from your kids like that!” I’m sure others feel the same way when they hear, “You’re truly missing out by not leaving your kids.” What does that even mean?
So, is my love for my kids any less than theirs? The answer is simple: love comes in many forms. It means doing what’s best for you and your family. For some, that means constant togetherness, while for others, it might involve a little distance and some personal time.
Regardless, love shouldn’t even be in question.
Understanding that my friends and I love our kids equally doesn’t resolve my vacation predicament. So… who’s up for a weekend getaway?
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Summary:
This article discusses the importance of taking a break as a parent while addressing the guilt that often accompanies the desire for personal time. It highlights that love for children comes in various forms and underscores that differing parenting styles do not equate to lesser love. Ultimately, the author seeks a weekend escape to reconnect with friends, emphasizing the need for self-care in motherhood.
Keyphrase: weekend getaway for moms
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