Those Independent Kids: A Neighbor’s Perspective

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Updated: June 8, 2020

Originally Published: April 23, 2015

The ongoing discussions surrounding the Meitiv family, known for their free-range parenting approach, have sparked quite the debate. The parents have faced intervention from Child Protective Services and police for letting their children roam their Maryland neighborhood unsupervised. Initially, I sympathized with the Meitivs, thinking they were simply nurturing their children’s independence while being unfairly scrutinized by overly concerned neighbors.

However, Jessica Harper, a neighbor, has offered a different narrative. She expresses frustration at being labeled a busybody and insists that the community isn’t a watchful brigade looking to police children’s freedom. “There are no gangs of vigilantes monitoring free-ranging kids in our area,” she asserts.

From what Harper has gathered through conversations with a dozen local parents, the Meitiv children—who appear to be perfectly nice and normal—have had their share of playground conflicts that needed adult intervention. There were also incidents where drivers had to slam on their brakes to avoid accidents when the children crossed streets without looking. On one occasion, they were escorted through a festival crowd because they had lost track of their parents.

Harper highlights that while the Meitivs may have good intentions, their approach to free-range parenting often necessitates the involvement of other adults. For instance, the person who called 911 after spotting the kids alone was simply a stranger out for a walk, who opted not to engage directly with them for fear of frightening them. This illustrates that the Meitivs’ parenting style impacts not only their family but also the community around them.

I understand their intentions, as my own children are just a year older than theirs. My son, who began middle school last September, recently got a cell phone, which marked the first time we allowed him to walk around the neighborhood by himself. Just last Sunday, he and his sister asked to walk to a local high school play, which is about a 10 to 15-minute trek. After some discussion about safety and responsibilities, we agreed to let them go. The outing turned out to be a success, giving them a taste of independence—albeit under a watchful eye.

While I reminisce about my own carefree childhood, I recognize that I don’t need to replicate it for my kids. Each parent must navigate their comfort levels and circumstances. I appreciate that my son has a phone for communication and reassurance. However, I would want my neighbors to step in if he ever found himself in a precarious situation. If my children were picked up by authorities even once, I’d have to rethink our approach. The stress of being questioned and becoming a topic of conversation among neighbors is undoubtedly challenging for those kids.

As one neighbor pointedly asked, “What should you do if you see two kids alone in a parking lot? Just ignore it?” Perhaps it’s time for the Meitivs to consider the perspectives of those around them, instead of expecting others to understand their choices without context.

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Summary:

The Meitiv family, advocates of free-range parenting, have faced scrutiny from neighbors and authorities for allowing their children to roam unsupervised. A neighbor, Jessica Harper, shares insights that indicate the children’s behavior sometimes necessitates adult intervention, highlighting the complexities of free-range parenting. While the desire for independence is understandable, it’s crucial for parents to consider how their choices affect the broader community.

Keyphrase: Free-Range Parenting

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