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The Remarkable Transformations That Happen When Kids Hit 12
by Jenna Thompson
Updated: Dec. 20, 2015
Originally Published: April 21, 2015
While turning twelve might not seem like a big deal at first glance, the transformations kids undergo during this pivotal year are nothing short of astonishing. Reflecting on my own twelfth year, it’s clear that the changes I experienced were profound and fundamental. My children might navigate a different world and face their unique challenges, yet I suspect they will look back on this year with a mix of excitement and trepidation, just as I did.
I’m not so far removed from my younger self to forget the confusion and uncertainty that came with that age. I recall stepping into seventh grade—the specifics of whether it was a middle school or a junior high escape me now. The first half of the year was a whirlwind, and by summer’s end, I was gearing up for eighth grade at a real junior high. It felt like I was stepping into adulthood.
As I think back, the person I was at the beginning of my twelfth year was vastly different from who I had become by year’s end.
In those early months, I played the flute, while by the end, I experienced my first kiss. My skills in both areas, however, left much to be desired. Initially, I was known as “Ghost Girl” for my pale complexion and sweetness, but by the year’s conclusion, my peers dubbed me “Lucy,” after the Peanuts character, reflecting my quirky antics.
Fashion-wise, I started the year with a feather in my hair, until it was banned in school. By the end, I found myself chewing on cinnamon toothpicks—another banned item—realizing then that school wasn’t necessarily a place for happiness. I began seventh grade in parachute pants and shoulder pads and ended it sporting blue eyeshadow, pondering why I was often alone.
At the start of that year, I had no curves and was guzzling milkshakes with raw eggs while obsessively doing “Increase My Bust” exercises. By the end, my routine remained unchanged, but my expectations had shifted. My reading material transitioned from Judy Blume’s Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret to Forever, all while I still wrestled with feelings of loneliness.
That year, I went from being afraid to stay home alone to babysitting the neighbor’s kids and even paying them a small portion of my allowance to give me space. My musical tastes evolved too; I traded Golden Earring and Lionel Richie for the likes of Duran Duran and U2.
Biking was a favorite pastime at the start of my twelfth year, but I soon found myself following Becky’s older sister, who taught us how to craft dresses out of trash bags. Family movie nights watching On Golden Pond morphed into sneaking episodes of 48 Hours with my friend Cathy.
By the end of the year, I had transitioned from Yves St. Laurent menthols to Camels, convinced I was quite the rebel. I had complex feelings about my father; at first, I wanted him gone, and by the end, I was grappling with his absence. Sleepovers were initially off-limits, yet I found myself participating in mischievous antics with friends, like freezing bras overnight.
Thoughts that had once been simple began to fill my diary, and I transitioned from listening to my parents’ favorite radio stations to discovering the world of alternative music. Friends who had previously faded from memory became significant figures, shaping my future.
As I help my children navigate their own transformations, I find it invaluable to recall my experiences from thirty years ago and recognize just how much I changed.
This article was originally published on April 21, 2015.
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Summary:
The journey through the twelfth year is marked by significant change, as children transition from innocent preteens to more complex adolescents. Through experiences of shifting friendships, evolving interests, and newfound independence, each child embarks on a unique path of growth, reminiscent of the changes I experienced three decades ago.
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