Dear little one,
From the very moment you entered the world, the focus has been on your appearance. Yes, you are stunning—especially in the eyes of your mom and dad. However, I hope you strive for recognition based on your skills and the hard work you put in, rather than merely your looks. Shine brightly. Be intelligent. Work diligently. Your beauty should be overshadowed by your brilliance, your curiosity, your dedication, your passion, your honesty, your humor, and your talents. While beauty will always hold its place, it will become even more treasured when it’s accompanied by a multitude of unique qualities.
People may often urge you to “Smile!”—strangers on the street and acquaintances alike. I want you to know that it’s perfectly acceptable to scowl, ponder, cry, sing, or smile as you see fit. Your expressions are a reflection of your heart, and you don’t owe anyone a forced smile just because they want to see you happy.
When I discovered you were a girl, the excitement of shopping for pink dresses filled the air. Some thought you would be the perfect balance to your brothers, while others exclaimed, “Girls rule, boys drool.” I hope you grow up to be more than just a stereotype—mix a little Hermione Granger with a dash of Judy Blume and a whole lot of Kurt Vonnegut. Watch Doctor Who, Star Wars, and Murphy Brown, but approach the Kardashians and Twilight series with caution.
Women are funny, and you can be so much more than just a nurse, a wife, or any cliché role. You can be the surgeon, the entrepreneur, or even the President. You have the freedom to be the lead, the sidekick, or even Tree Number Seven in a play.
Being an alto has its merits, and there’s beauty in a cappella. Don’t shy away from taking center stage when the time comes. I encourage you to learn to spike, field, kick, bat, dribble, and run. Pink is nice, but it’s not everything; it softens and dazzles, but there’s a whole spectrum of colors out there.
Embrace those “Holy Yeses” whenever possible. The things that frighten you often offer the greatest lessons and (if you’re fortunate) moments of awe. Don’t fear unpopularity; fear those who excuse rudeness. Jump high and embrace your energy, but know when to take a breather.
Math can seem tricky, but remember that it just requires time and patience. Invest in it, for some questions have right and wrong answers—just like life. Learn new languages, navigate public transport, and don’t hesitate to say “no, thank you.”
Be mindful of your language, especially with words like “bitch” and the c-word. Other women should not be your enemies by default, just as men shouldn’t be seen as adversaries. Embrace your femininity and appreciate masculinity in others.
Learning to express yourself concisely is a valuable skill, but listening is an even greater gift. The word “cute” loses its charm as you grow older. Focus on your health and happiness rather than worrying about fitting into societal standards. Indulge every once in a while, savor each moment, laugh often, apologize sincerely, and forgive freely.
Raise an eyebrow or two at life’s absurdities, and know that I’d keep you swaddled in my arms forever if it would help you become a better person—but I understand that it wouldn’t. No matter who you become or what advice you choose to heed, remember this: I love you.
With all my love,
Mom
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