It was 1991, during my junior year at college, when I first noticed Ben. Living with a group of rowers in a sorority house, I found myself at a lively end-of-season party. With drinks flowing, I overindulged in a concoction called Purple Passion, and the world began to sway around me. As I leaned against the door, Ben was there, and my teammate, Lisa, playfully advised him to ensure my safety. When I finally crawled into bed, Ben wrapped me in a blanket and settled down on the floor beside me, showing restraint and care. The next morning, he was there, checking in on me, which was a comforting reminder of his character.
Then there was Mark. He was my roommate’s high school friend, and at first glance, he seemed easygoing, though he carried a bit of extra weight. I met him at a party early in the school year, and when I attended a fraternity event where he was trying to pledge, he offered me a tour of the house. As we ventured upstairs, his demeanor shifted, and before I knew it, I was caught off guard in a darkened room. In a split second, I found myself on the bed, his intentions clear. I pushed back with every ounce of strength and managed to escape, but it was a frightening reminder of how quickly situations can turn.
And then there was Derek, the backup quarterback who charmed me at a local bar. A shiny red sports car and a smooth talker, I naively invited him to my dorm. As we sat across from each other, I realized he was expecting something different from our interaction. He excused himself politely, leaving me with a lesson learned about assumptions.
Lastly, there was Hugo. A friend’s boyfriend who called me, pretending to seek advice. I went over, thinking I could help. What began as a friendly visit quickly spiraled out of control. He offered me a drink and then a back rub, before pinning me down and ignoring my pleas to stop.
These experiences have shaped my perspective as a mother to a little boy. The most crucial four-letter word I am instilling in him is “STOP.” Whether we are playfully wrestling or sharing a moment of affection, if he expresses discomfort, I immediately respect his wishes. He understands that his body is his own, and that consent is paramount.
I teach him that kindness toward everyone, regardless of their background, is non-negotiable. He is not entitled to anyone’s attention or affection and must always exhibit patience and compassion. I hope that with these lessons, he will become a respectful man who never crosses anyone’s boundaries.
The notion of “Boys Will Be Boys” is outdated and allows problematic behavior to persist. Instead, I want my son to embody positive four-letter words: Kind, Love, Hope, and Help. These values will serve as a foundation that overshadows any negative influences he may encounter.
As a mother, I strive to raise a boy who respects himself and others. I’m grateful for a husband who exemplifies the qualities I wish for our son. Together, we will work to nurture a mindset that defies the stereotypes surrounding masculinity.
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In summary, as I guide my son through life, I will emphasize the importance of respect, kindness, and awareness of boundaries. By instilling these values, I hope to raise a compassionate man who contributes positively to the world.
Keyphrase: Teaching Consent to Boys
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