I see you over there, quietly shaking your head as my child, Jamie, and I engage in a lively discussion in a public space. I notice the subtle grimaces and eye rolls when Jamie doesn’t adhere to the social norms you deem appropriate. I see you instructing your child to steer clear of Jamie, labeling him as a “bad influence” or a “problematic kid.”
But here’s the thing: Jamie is blissfully unaware of your judgment. He’s too busy enjoying life to care what others think, while I can’t help but notice the disdain etched on your face. Do you truly believe I love my child any less because he faces challenges that yours may not? Do you think your child, simply because he fits societal expectations, is somehow superior to mine?
It takes all my strength to hold my tongue when I see you casting judgment on Jamie. I desperately want to confront you, to say, “I see you! I see the way you’re looking at us!” But unlike Jamie, I hold back. More importantly, I’d rather he never realizes that some people view him as lacking. He is content and happy with who he is—a state I want to preserve for as long as possible.
Every individual has their own struggles. Perfection is a myth, and perhaps your flaw lies in your tendency to judge others.
You see, there are countless facets of Jamie you don’t recognize. You don’t see the unconditional love he has for me, or the fierce loyalty he shows to those he cares about. You don’t witness his academic achievements, nor do you see the moments when he makes me laugh until I’m in tears with his unique take on life. You may not even realize he feels emotions more profoundly than many, experiencing both joy and sadness in ways others might overlook.
But you focus on the surface—his loud voice, his propensity to be distracted, his emotional responses—and have decided he’s unintelligent or undeserving of your attention. Guess what? You aren’t worthy of mine, either.
Jamie is genuine, compassionate, and works tirelessly to be his best self. He doesn’t waste time casting judgment on others; instead, he revels in the world around him. Don’t you wish you could embrace life with the same joy?
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In summary, we all have our battles, and judgment only serves to highlight our own insecurities. Let’s strive for empathy instead, embracing the unique qualities that each person brings.
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