No matter how hard you attempt to keep your professional life distinct from your family life, the two inevitably intertwine like old friends. When I returned to the workforce last year, intent on becoming the ultimate career woman, I didn’t fully consider the impact years of dedicated motherhood had on my identity. You can leave the house, but you can’t leave the mom behind. Here’s a lighthearted look at the unmistakable signs that you are, without a doubt, the mom in the office:
- You pull out a random piece of scrap paper during a meeting, only to discover it’s the chicken pox and lice alert from your child’s school. “What are you writing on? Oh no! Does anyone else feel itchy?!”
- You find yourself using a pen topped with a wild-haired troll for erasing—not as a quirky choice, but simply because it’s the only writing tool that actually works in your bag. I’ve resorted to crayons, scented markers, and good ol’ #2 pencils. Why do kids clamor for the troll pen but stick to my boring black Bic?
- You occasionally mix up your department’s name with your children’s names.
- You apply your best toddler negotiation tactics to soothe an upset coworker. “Shhh, let’s go sit over here and have a little snack. Feeling better now? Good job!”
- In moments of frustration, you cycle through a list of 15 names while trying to call out to a colleague—mixing in your kids’, pets’, and even cartoon characters’ names. “Billy, Sandy, Dora, Peter Rabbit—oh, for crying out loud, what’s your name? You forgot your notebook! (Maybe that explains why I call my department my kids.)”
- You secretly rejoice when your coworkers show up hungover after a night out, because you were tired of being the only one in the office with dark circles under your eyes. (Will our kids ever learn to sleep through the night? Right?!)
- You find yourself lingering in the office past 5 PM, relishing the quiet—thank you to my daycare for staying open until 6 PM!
- In fact, you actually look forward to Mondays because they offer a much-needed respite from the chaos at home.
- While others chat about their favorite TV shows, you’re the lone voice saying, “Nick Jr.”
- When management needs a last-minute project tackled, you’re their go-to person. After handling two kids, two schools, and a slew of extracurriculars, what’s a little work project, right?
Perhaps being the office mom isn’t such a bad gig after all!
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In summary, the blend of motherhood and work life often leads to humorous and relatable situations that remind us of our dual roles. Embracing this chaos can lead to unexpected joys and camaraderie among fellow working moms.
Keyphrase: office mom humor
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