“Oh my gosh, she is absolutely precious!” I can tell without even glancing up from the cereal box that the woman is admiring one of my three daughters.
“Where does she get that stunning strawberry-blonde hair? And those big, enchanting brown eyes…” Her voice drifts off as she gazes, seemingly captivated by my daughter’s remarkable features.
“Actually, red hair is a recessive trait, so my husband and I must have it lurking in our family tree somewhere.” I try to respond politely, even though I’ve had this same conversation just 10 minutes ago, a few aisles over. I’ll likely have it again before I exit the grocery store. I glance at my other two daughters, with their caramel-colored hair and lighter eyes. They resemble both my husband and me, while my middle child resembles a cartoon cherub—almost too adorable to be real.
The compliments about her looks began the day she was born, with nurses fawning over her, and they haven’t stopped since.
Everywhere we go. Seriously. Everywhere.
“She’s just … I’ve never seen a baby so flawless!”
“She should model for a magazine!”
“She’s definitely the cutest of your kids … and she knows it.”
“Don’t get me wrong—all your girls are lovely, but that one…”
All three of my daughters have had the same teachers, yet my middle one seems to get away with things my others would never dream of. People assume she’s sweet and smart simply because she’s adorable. “What a little angel, and so clever!” they’ll exclaim as she picks her nose during church.
She often lands speaking roles in plays, engages more in conversations, and at blogging events, PR folks always pull her aside for photos.
This is a new experience for me—having a child whose beauty can stop people in their tracks. As comedian Amy Poehler would put it, my strength has always been my personality. Back when I was single, I’d linger near the restroom until my friends snagged free drinks, then swoop in as the designated talker to fend off any unwanted attention.
Don’t misunderstand me—being a little below average in looks isn’t all bad. I developed a strong personality to make friends, my parents never worried about me announcing a teenage pregnancy, and I’ve likely saved a fortune on pageant attire. But let’s be honest—life tends to be easier for the beautiful. Dating, making friends, even landing jobs is smoother. A 2013 study by Business Insider revealed that attractive job applicants were 24% more likely to receive a callback compared to their less attractive counterparts.
However, this beauty has its drawbacks for my daughter. I’ve had people jokingly offer to buy her (which is amusing, but catch me on a bad day, and I might consider it), and I’ve had strangers ask to take her photo (umm, no thanks), even catching people discreetly videotaping her (who are now comfortably resting in shallow graves).
As a parent, I’m not quite sure how to navigate this. While I enjoy the compliments, I worry about her ego and, more importantly, how my other daughters might feel about their own looks. Should I downplay her beauty? “Wow! She’s so cute!” “Meh. I’ve seen better.” Or should I emphasize my other daughters’ charm? Showcase their healthy gums like show dogs? But look at the shiny coat on this one!
For now, I’ll stick to smiling, saying thanks, and explaining basic genetics to total strangers. One day, though, I’m definitely teaching my girls how to leverage teamwork for free drinks.
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In summary, parenting a child who garners more attention due to her beauty can be a balancing act. While I appreciate the compliments, my goal is to ensure that all my daughters feel valued for who they are, not just how they look.
Keyphrase: Raising a beautiful child among siblings
Tags: home insemination kit, home insemination syringe, self insemination