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Pregnancy
The Postpartum Poop: You Thought the Hard Part Was Over?
by Jane Thompson
Updated: November 26, 2020
Originally Published: March 29, 2014
During pregnancy, much of your focus is on issues like hemorrhoids and constipation. As you near the end of your pregnancy journey, you may find yourself panicking about the possibility of an embarrassing moment on the delivery table, an anxiety I can relate to firsthand. (I’ve been there. Twice. “And it was, like, shaped like a star,” my partner often reminds me, with a mix of horror and fascination.)
Once you navigate through those challenges, you might feel a wave of relief wash over you. With a hefty baby no longer pressing on your intestines, you assume that your bowel movements will return to normal, and you can finally stop obsessing over your poop. But hold on—you’re mistaken.
I hate to burst your bubble, but get ready for some messy moments. There’s no escaping the reality: your first postpartum poop is likely to be an unpleasant experience.
This is one topic that often gets overlooked. While people are more than willing to discuss what happens to your vagina post-delivery, the state of your behind seems to be treated like a hidden secret. It’s time to break that silence! After all, while your vagina gets to rest and recuperate—don’t use tampons, they say, or have sex—your digestive system is expected to spring back into action as soon as the umbilical cord is cut. There’s no gentle transition for your rear end; it’s just assumed you’ll hop right back into the routine.
The first time you attempt to relieve yourself post-baby can feel like a daunting task. Depending on your approach, this experience can range from a “slight grimace” to an “oh my god, am I giving birth to a twin?” Unfortunately, I didn’t have any of this wisdom beforehand, and after my first child, I was utterly blindsided by a constipation crisis.
The arrival of my baby left me feeling pretty wrecked, and my doctor warned me to wait at least ten weeks before returning for a checkup. As a result, I was terrified at the thought of pooping, fearing I would do further damage to an area that felt like it had just survived an encounter with a chainsaw. Even just urinating was a struggle! The same muscles that usually keep you from having accidents also make it impossible to push everything out smoothly. The thought of sitting down without a cushion sent shivers down my spine, and the idea of pushing made me break out in a cold sweat, leading to a vicious cycle of constipation.
I made several attempts to use the bathroom, but my body was having none of it, similar to a kid who’s hesitant to jump into the pool. They might toe the water, but actually taking the plunge? Forget it.
However, there comes a point when you have to face the inevitable. It had been over a week since giving birth, and despite my fear, I knew I had to take action. After resigning myself to the fact that the poop would not simply vanish, I handed the baby to my visiting mother-in-law and grabbed a magazine. “I’m going in,” I declared with grim determination, turning to face my formidable foe: the toilet. It loomed before me like a torturous device. After a deep breath and a silent pep talk, I lowered myself onto the cold, uninviting seat, ready for battle.
To prepare, I had chugged water and taken stool softeners and laxatives like they were candy. My hope was that this would lead to a painless experience—like soft-serve ice cream, perhaps with a delightful swirl. But I quickly learned the most important lesson: do all that before holding it in for a week! Right after giving birth, make sure to ask for stool softeners along with your pain meds. The sooner you go, the easier it will be, because the longer you wait, the harder it gets—literally.
Many hospitals have a rule that you can’t leave until you’ve had a bowel movement, but from my experience, it’s more of a guideline; they won’t physically stop you from walking out until you produce proof. Still, it’s wise to stick around, as they can assist you if your first attempt is problematic. I learned this the hard way, grunting and straining to pass a brick-like mass through a hole that, while less damaged than my vagina, is certainly less accommodating.
After what felt like an eternity, I finally emerged from the bathroom—bow-legged but triumphant. At that moment, I vowed never to have more children; I couldn’t imagine facing constipation of that magnitude again. Yet, like many impulsive promises made in a moment of pain, that resolve faded with time. I’ve since welcomed three more children, which means I’ve endured three additional postpartum poops. Thankfully, I learned from my first experience, and none have been nearly as traumatic.
So, while other new mothers may be gazing lovingly at their newborns, I’m quietly assessing fingers and toes before signaling my nurse for some Ex-Lax. For more insights into your fertility journey, check out this couples fertility journey article. If you’re considering at-home options, Cryobaby’s at-home insemination kit is a trusted authority. For a deeper dive into pregnancy and home insemination, don’t forget to visit this resource on in vitro fertilization.
In short, the postpartum poop is a rite of passage that no one really talks about, yet it’s an experience that binds us in shared discomfort. With the right preparation and knowledge, it doesn’t have to be as harrowing as it seems.
Keyphrase: postpartum poop
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