People are amazing, and everywhere we go, my daughter, who is three and has Down syndrome, attracts attention like a superstar. It’s heartwarming to see strangers come up to her and shower her with affection. Most of the time, it’s lovely—until some well-meaning individuals say things that really get under my skin. I know they mean well, but here are five compliments that I believe should be retired from the conversation.
- “Children with Down syndrome are special gifts.” While I can’t argue that children are indeed a blessing, I hear this phrase far too often. It tends to overshadow my other children, who might feel overlooked in the process. It creates a sense of separation, making it seem like my daughter is on a pedestal. I want to be able to express when she’s being a typical three-year-old without feeling guilty about it.
- “She’s always so joyful and easygoing!” Yes, my daughter has a cheerful disposition, but let’s be real—she’s a toddler! Just like any other child her age, she has her share of tantrums, mischief, and the occasional meltdown. Stereotypes about people with Down syndrome being perpetually happy are simply not accurate. As one of my friends aptly put it, “She has Down syndrome, not a lobotomy!”
- “She doesn’t look like she has Down syndrome!” Honestly, yes she does. She has a unique blend of her father’s and my features, alongside the characteristics associated with Down syndrome, like almond-shaped eyes and low-set ears. When people say she doesn’t “look” like she has Down syndrome, it feels like they’re implying she’s pretty only because she doesn’t fit the stereotype. I wish for people to just see her for who she truly is—my beautiful daughter.
- “Think of it this way: you’ll have a child living with you forever!” This is misleading. Adults with Down syndrome are not just oversized children; they lead full lives, experience love, and gain independence just like anyone else. I want my daughter to grow up and thrive. I’m excited for her future, and I hope for her independence.
- “I could never do what you do! You’re amazing!” Ugh. This phrase can feel like a heavy burden. You don’t know what you can handle until you’re faced with it. Telling me I’m a hero places me on an unrealistic pedestal that I can’t maintain. I’m just a regular mom navigating an extraordinary situation, loving my kids fiercely like any parent would.
In the end, it’s always better to show support than to say nothing at all. While I appreciate the kind intentions, it’s essential to recognize that every child is unique, and every family deserves understanding without stereotypes. For more on parenting and fertility journeys, check out this informative post on couples’ fertility journey and discover helpful insights from this resource.
Summary
Engaging with families of children with Down syndrome requires sensitivity and awareness. Avoiding common but potentially hurtful compliments can foster better understanding and connection. Recognize that each child is unique, and every parent navigates their journey with love and care.
Keyphrase: Compliments to avoid about Down syndrome
Tags: [“home insemination kit” “home insemination syringe” “self insemination”]