10 Thoughts Kids Have While Dyeing Easter Eggs

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Before I became a parent, I had this idyllic vision of dyeing Easter eggs with my future kids. I imagined them in pristine white outfits, delicately submerging farm-fresh eggs into natural dyes—maybe even with a few backyard chickens clucking around. Reality hit hard once I had my daughter, and I totally understand why my mom opted for plastic eggs. Whoever invented the whole egg-dyeing tradition clearly didn’t have kids!

If you’re gearing up for egg dyeing this Easter, take it from someone who has learned the hard way: Do it outdoors. Ideally, find a remote field, strip everyone down to their skivvies, and stockpile paper towels and some calming aids. Most of your eggs will probably end up cracked, none will look like the masterpieces on Pinterest, and you’ll likely end up with a palette of sad, murky colors instead of cheerful pastels. Why? Because little ones have a whole different perspective on the art of dyeing eggs.

Here’s what they might be thinking while getting their hands—and everything else—covered in dye:

  1. First off, these eggs would make fantastic projectiles!
  2. If this dye is pretty on eggs, just imagine how stunning it will look in my hair, on my clothes, and adorning the walls—Mommy’s dining room chairs could really use my artistic touch!
  3. Ugh, Mommy, these eggs smell gross! It’s like a fart factory in here!
  4. Last time I encountered a blue egg, it was filled with chocolate! Where’s the chocolate in this one? MOMMY! I want chocolate! WAAAHHH!!!
  5. I wonder if I can smash this egg on my brother’s head? Just for fun?
  6. So if red and yellow make orange, what do red, yellow, green, blue, pink, and purple make? Why do my eggs look like they came from Halloween? The world is ending! My eggs are hideous!
  7. I despise hardboiled eggs! Please tell me the Easter Bunny is bringing something other than these! I’ve been good! (Cue the waterworks.)
  8. All these bright colors look delicious! The red one must taste like cherry, right? YUCK! IT’S VINEGAR! GET IT OUT OF MY MOUTH!
  9. Seventeen eggs and six cups of dye = done in three minutes. Can I have the iPad now? I’d rather watch videos of toys being opened than deal with these eggs!
  10. Jumping in muddy puddles is awesome, but imagine the fun of splashing in rainbow puddles inside the house! I’m pouring this beautiful dye all over the kitchen floor—this is the best day ever!

Happy Easter, everyone! If you’re interested in more parenting insights, check out our post on starting your family journey, which can be found here. For more resources on home insemination, visit this page. And for an excellent guide on Intrauterine insemination, you can find helpful info here.

In short, egg dyeing with kids is a chaotic but hilarious experience filled with unexpected surprises and colorful messes!

Keyphrase: kids thoughts while dyeing Easter eggs

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