Menu: Parenting
Why Do We Teach Kids to Speak?
by Taylor Morgan
Updated: June 25, 2016
Originally Published: Aug. 28, 2010
As parents, we often find ourselves anxiously awaiting our little one’s first words—it’s a milestone that stirs excitement. We invest countless hours helping them articulate their thoughts, teaching them the names of everything around them, and counting each new word they master. We celebrate those two- and three-word phrases and eagerly anticipate the ultimate achievement: complete sentences.
But let’s pause for a moment—are we missing the point? Should we really be fostering this newfound ability to communicate? Maybe we should actually be encouraging our kids to hold off on talking for as long as possible.
Why, you ask? Because toddlers with a knack for speech can often become social landmines, dropping verbal bombs at the most inconvenient times. Suddenly, our private lives are under scrutiny—we have to censor our words and avoid controversial topics. It’s like trying to be a saint in a world that’s anything but.
For someone like me, raised on the East Coast, this verbal restraint feels like asking me to completely change who I am. Controlling my language is as tough as promising to go vegetarian forever—nearly impossible. Have you ever experienced Seattle traffic? Between the congestion and the relentless politeness, it takes every ounce of self-control to keep my language PG. More like PG-13, to be honest.
The downside? When you slip up, your kids will gleefully repeat what they hear. If you let slip a negative remark about Aunt Linda, you can bet your child will happily announce, “Mommy doesn’t like it when you visit!” And if you think it’s harmless to curse in front of your kid, brace yourself for the day they enthusiastically greet their preschool classmates with a cheerful, “Hi, losers!”
Forget your privacy; it’s officially out the window. You might as well star in a reality show because your child will share every juicy detail. Everything is fair game—your eating habits, how you cope with stress, and even your sleep preferences. Considering we openly discuss similar topics about our toddlers with strangers, it’s only fitting that they reciprocate.
The real trouble arises when their verbal skills combine with their curiosity. Suddenly, you’re faced with questions in public settings that lead to awkwardness. Picture this: your child spots a teacher rocking skinny jeans and asks loudly, “Mommy, why is her butt in the front?” You’ll find yourself scrambling to explain without offending anyone.
Or imagine a peaceful day at the park when your child loudly wonders, “Mommy, why does that man only have one leg?” Now, you’re tasked with turning the situation into a superhero narrative while everyone else leans in, waiting for your response.
And then there’s the moment your androgynous friend visits for dinner, prompting your child to ask, “Mommy, how come you keep saying SHE if HE is a boy?” At this point, you might need a bottle of wine to navigate the conversation safely.
The most frustrating part? You often see the embarrassment coming but can do nothing to prevent it. You’ll be in a grocery store, and your child’s eyes land on that one person you’re praying they don’t notice. Despite your best efforts to distract them, nothing works. It’s like that time when they suddenly announced, “Mommy, I found another hair in my food!” at a dinner party.
Here’s a taste of the hilariously cringe-worthy moments my kids have had:
- “What are all those lines on your face?” directed at an older friend.
- “Do you have a baby in your tummy?” aimed at my dad.
- “Your breath is stinky!” said out loud right after I drank coffee.
- “Your house smells disgusting!” proclaimed during a playdate.
So, how about we reconsider our encouragement for kids to chat? They’ll have plenty of time to express themselves as they grow older. If you’re interested in more parenting tips and resources, check out this article on home insemination kits or explore Couples’ Fertility Journey for insights that can be helpful. For more on pregnancy, visit this excellent resource.
In summary, while teaching our kids to talk is a significant milestone, it can open doors to unexpected challenges. Perhaps a little delay in verbal expression wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all.
Keyphrase: Teaching Kids to Talk
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