I’m fed up with songs glorifying twerking and reckless partying. The mainstream radio scene is saturated with misogyny, overt sexuality, and rampant substance use. Seriously?
Sure, I might sound like one of those concerned parents from the ‘80s, but I have a 10-year-old son who is not only obsessed with pop music but can also decipher every lyric (unlike me—I’m officially “out of touch,” always asking, “What did they just say?”).
We have parental controls on our devices and strict limits on screen time. We monitor TV shows and check films on Common Sense Media to ensure they’re appropriate for his age. But the radio? It feels like a media free-for-all in my home, and the only solution I can think of is a complete ban, which feels both harsh and difficult to enforce.
So, what are my options? We don’t have satellite radio with its curated playlists. My kids aren’t interested in oldies or Christian stations, and NPR is a hard pass for them. Silence isn’t an option either—my music-loving son insists on having the radio on constantly. I’ve even caught him sneaking the laundry room radio into his room more than once, and I’ve quietly returned it, partly because the DJs’ banter can be just as questionable as the music.
It’s easy to assume this is a new dilemma for parents, but it’s not. I remember my older siblings ordering records from Columbia House while I sat in the kitchen listening to my mother scrutinizing the lyrics. “This song is about a prostitute,” she’d say disapprovingly while playing The Police’s “Roxanne.” My siblings defended it, arguing that the message was ultimately positive. They definitely won that battle.
Of course, parents aren’t always there to vet songs (and who has the time or inclination?). Growing up near New York City, I had my own clock radio tuned to my favorite station. One morning, I turned it on and found Howard Stern’s show had moved to the morning slot. At 11 or 12 years old, I was horrified to hear him asking female guests about their underwear. It was a stark reminder of the inappropriate questions some boys would ask girls in school.
In search of more suitable content, I switched to all-news radio. Instead of Howard Stern, I was greeted with reports about the horrible Central Park Jogger case and the Preppy Murder incident. Not exactly a better alternative. And while there was some pop music, it certainly didn’t shield me from the harsh realities of the world. My parents had no clue about the content I was exposed to in my own room.
The reality is that tweens are going to encounter inappropriate content, whether we like it or not, and often, it will be through the radio, even if we’re diligent about other media. So, I’ve decided to decrease his solo listening time and increase our shared listening experiences. Why not turn it into a conversation starter?
When my siblings and I were new drivers, my mom would encourage us to drive with her as much as possible so we could learn from her before hitting the road solo. I think the same principle applies to media consumption. The more we listen together, the more opportunities I have to address troubling lyrics and comments, like DJs making snide remarks about their “nagging” wives. I won’t hesitate to change the station, but in doing so, I aim to be the voice in his head that encourages critical thinking about the messages he hears.
There’s hope yet. My siblings managed to convince my mom that “Roxanne” was an acceptable song by demonstrating their thoughtful engagement with the lyrics. Similarly, my son has argued that a woman singing “you don’t own me” is a more empowering message than another song about looking good for someone else. He’s partially correct, and I hope he’ll one day realize that no one should have to assert their independence in the first place.
So, I’ll keep the dialogue open, and hopefully, he’ll keep questioning. It might be time to stop shielding him from the world and start equipping him to engage with it.
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Summary
Navigating the world of pop music with kids can be challenging, especially when much of it contains inappropriate content. Parents can’t always shield their children from these messages, but engaging in discussions about the lyrics and themes can help foster critical thinking. It’s about finding a balance between allowing kids to enjoy their music and preparing them to understand its implications.
Keyphrase: navigating pop music with kids
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