In light of recent events, I found myself reflecting on the harrowing media coverage of a troubling incident in Steubenville. I witnessed the emotional turmoil of young men—young men who had committed a heinous act against a girl. The narrative often focused on their so-called “promising futures” being derailed, while the victim bore the brunt of blame for her intoxication. What struck me most was the absence of intervention that night; no one stepped in to defend this girl. Instead, they laughed, took photos, and continued to vilify her while supporting the boys who perpetrated this crime. The ongoing victim-blaming surrounding this rape is simply unacceptable. We owe it to ourselves and to the next generation to do better. We can foster a culture where individuals look out for one another. Importantly, we must recognize that rape is a crime, and it is never the victim’s fault.
As a mother of three daughters, I am filled with apprehension. While I strive to teach them to make wise choices, I yearn for a society that protects its own. I hope they will be the ones to extend a hand to those in need, whether they’re friends or strangers. Regardless of the decisions they make or the gatherings they attend, it is imperative to remember: NO ONE has the right to violate them. It is not their fault, and it will never be.
I recall being 17, a cheerleader living in a small town, dating boys who were considered popular. I often found myself in situations that, looking back, felt like my doing. I liked to party and sometimes drank too much, going out when I should have been home. I dated boys who I thought cared for me, mistaking their attention for genuine affection. I became known as the “drunk girl” with a reputation in our small community.
One fateful night, while at a party, I had what I believed was consensual sex with my boyfriend. In the dim light of the room, he excused himself, and when he returned, I reached for his hair—only to discover that the person on top of me was not him. It was not my boyfriend.
I screamed and fought back, but he was physically stronger. In moments, my so-called boyfriend was there, holding me down while I was assaulted. I was intoxicated, foolish, and just a teenager, but none of that was my fault. It took me almost three decades to acknowledge that truth.
Afterward, I was called derogatory names and left alone to cry, while threats were made against me if I dared to speak out. The boys simply laughed and dismissed everything, claiming “boys will be boys.” But it wasn’t okay then, and it isn’t okay now.
This reflection serves as a reminder that we must create an environment of support and accountability. It is crucial that we protect those who are vulnerable and ensure that no one else experiences the pain I endured.
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In summary, we need to foster an environment that emphasizes responsibility, support, and the understanding that victims are never at fault for the crimes committed against them.
Keyphrase: victim blaming in sexual assault
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