Please Don’t Feel Ashamed of Your Tantruming Child

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Recently, my friend Lisa and her young son spent the weekend at our home, and it was clear that her little one was feeling out of sorts in a new environment. He was fussy, clung to her side, and struggled to settle down for sleep. Our house isn’t particularly babyproofed anymore, and we had long ago removed the baby gates, so he was getting into everything—especially the stairs.

As the weekend progressed, I noticed Lisa’s growing discomfort. She kept apologizing for her son’s “behavior,” emphasizing how he usually isn’t like this. My husband and I reassured her repeatedly, saying, “It’s perfectly fine. We have kids too; we understand.” But I could sense that she was finding it hard to relax and accept the situation.

Here’s what I wish I could have conveyed: I genuinely appreciate when other children act up. It might sound strange, but I find comfort in the fact that my kids aren’t the only ones who have their moments of chaos. Whining, crying, and clinginess remind me that parenting is a shared experience filled with ups and downs.

Often, I find myself feeling embarrassed when my kids misbehave, worried that others are judging my parenting skills. So seeing another child express their frustrations is a relief. It serves as a reminder that the polished images we often see on social media or at gatherings don’t represent reality.

I want to assure you, Lisa, that I wasn’t at all bothered when you had to excuse yourself multiple times to help your son. In fact, witnessing his willfulness was somewhat comforting, as I sometimes wonder if my own kids have oppositional defiant disorder.

Hearing your son cry throughout the day reminded me of my own experiences. My child was a screamer for the first year! Before this weekend, I thought your little guy never cried. Now I see he has his moments too.

You may have felt frustrated that your son wasn’t napping as he does at home, having to go upstairs repeatedly to coax him into bed. I remember feeling envious when we took our infants out for lunch, and yours peacefully dozed while mine created a mess. It’s refreshing to know that not every child is a perfect little angel.

So please, don’t apologize when your child acts out. When I see your son clinging to you and shouting for you to pick him up, I am reassured that my children aren’t the only ones capable of mischief. I truly enjoy seeing that your child has his own set of challenges, just like mine do.

Next time I’m in a similar situation, I hope to feel less embarrassed when my kids start their antics because I’ll remember that it’s all part of the parenting journey.

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Summary

In conclusion, it’s essential to embrace the reality of parenting, including the moments when our children act out. These experiences are universal, and seeing others go through similar challenges can provide a comforting reminder that no parent is alone in their struggles.

Keyphrase: parenting challenges
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