It’s Acceptable to Seek Assistance from Our Children on Challenging Days

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Today was one of those exhausting days filled with self-doubt, where I felt completely overwhelmed and just wanted to retreat under the covers. With the persistent cold I’ve been battling, the relentless chaos of the current political climate, and the whirlwind of thoughts racing through my mind, I felt like my head might burst at any moment. All I longed for was a comforting embrace and a chance to rest.

However, the reality is that life doesn’t pause just because a parent is unwell and needs a moment of care. Responsibilities continue to pile up, and the daily grind presses on. Given the circumstances, tonight had all the makings of a typical meltdown for a mom. I was feeling under the weather, my partner was stuck working late, and our babysitter had to cancel due to illness. I was left to take my kids to a church gathering without a proper meal prepared and with no time to whip something up. Everything felt like an uphill battle, and I was certain I was failing at adulting.

Typically, when I am under stress, I tend to put on a brave face and push through. Unfortunately, this often leads to snapping at my kids in the kitchen while preparing dinner or nagging them about their homework. However, tonight, I decided to take a different approach.

Instead of pretending everything was fine, I turned to my kids and said, “I really need your help. I’m not feeling well. I know neither of you wants to go to this meeting, and I don’t want you to go either, but we have no choice. I feel terrible, and I just want to go to bed. All I need from you both is to finish your homework and avoid any fighting. Please try not to embarrass me at the meeting. Just be kind to one another. I’m asking for your help because I’m really struggling right now.”

Whether it was the extended tablet time they received at the meeting or the treats we picked up afterwards, they surprisingly stepped up. Not only did they keep the bickering to a minimum, but they also helped out when we returned home. They guided me to bed, brought me drinks, and even folded laundry while chatting with their dad on the phone about where my bras belonged. They even made me a thoughtful card, brushed their teeth without fuss, and—miraculously—went to sleep!

I reached out for assistance, and to my surprise, my children responded positively. It’s a good reminder that we don’t have to be martyrs in parenting or in life. Asking for help and allowing others to support us is not a sign of weakness; in fact, it can strengthen our family bonds. We can take breaks without feeling guilty, and we can reveal our vulnerabilities without being perceived as weak.

So, to all the parents out there, it’s completely fine to let your children see your struggles and to ask for their support. It’s okay to admit when you’re overwhelmed and to take a step back. It’s perfectly acceptable to let things slide, like dishes in the sink or laundry in the wrong places. It’s alright to say, “I’m not sure what I’m doing, but I’m trying.” Embracing our humanity means accepting both our strengths and our vulnerabilities.

In summary, acknowledging when you feel unwell and seeking help is perfectly acceptable. It’s a vital part of the parenting journey, and ultimately, everything will be alright.

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Keyphrase: Asking for help as a parent

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