Today, I sent my youngest child off to kindergarten. I expected to feel elated about this milestone, especially since he is my “active” child. My days with him are often spent managing his energetic tendencies, which can be both exhausting and overwhelming. The idea of having a few hours each day to focus on normal activities, like taking my daughter to the museum or enjoying a peaceful walk, felt like a dream.
As I helped him into his pajamas last night, he began to voice the typical concerns of a child about to embark on their educational journey.
“Will I have to bring my school supplies home every day?”
“No, honey. They will stay at school.”
“But what if I have homework?”
“You’ll bring home what you need to do, and everything else will be here.”
“What if I need scissors?”
“We have scissors at home.”
“Where?”
“I’ll show you later.”
“What if my teacher yells at me?”
“Why would she yell at you?”
“Because I’m bad. What if she doesn’t like me?”
Wait, what? I had never realized my son thought of himself as a “bad kid.” While he often hears reminders about household rules and has faced consequences for misbehavior—like being sent to his room for throwing a bat during a game or for leaving the sink running—my husband and I have always emphasized that his actions don’t define his character. We strive to reinforce positive behavior with praise and rewards, yet he still perceives himself as undesirable. Hearing him express these feelings was heartbreaking.
At such a tender age, he already exhibits signs of self-doubt that accompany the struggles of ADHD. My sweet boy, with his big blue eyes and kind heart, is so much more than he believes. He is the child who covers his sister with a blanket when she falls asleep, cheers on his brother during baseball games, and sings joyfully in his room when he thinks no one is watching. Yet, he fears rejection from his soon-to-be teacher.
As I watched him walk towards the towering school doors, I felt tears welling up. It was hard to see him blend into the crowd of children, dwarfed by his oversized backpack and the older kids. He didn’t look back, my brave little man. Deep down, I knew he was nervous, but he marched into this new world—a world I hope will recognize and embrace him for who he is.
Once back in my car, the tears flowed freely. “What’s wrong, Mommy?” my daughter asked.
“I’m just going to miss him so much,” I managed to say through my sobs.
“I know, Mommy. He’s my best boy. I’m going to miss my good boy too.”
I can only hope that the world sees him as we do—a loving, kind, and thoughtful child deserving of acceptance.
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Summary
Navigating the transition to kindergarten for a child with ADHD can be emotionally challenging for parents. It is crucial to foster positive self-esteem and reinforce that behaviors do not define their worth. As parents, we must ensure our children feel loved and accepted, and we can only hope that the educational environment reflects that acceptance.
Keyphrase: Preparing Your Child with ADHD for Kindergarten
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