As I attempt to find a moment of solace in the bathroom, I overheard your whispered comment, “Mom is about to lose it.” You may have thought I was oblivious, but trust me, I caught that loud and clear. And honestly? My reaction is not one of sadness or regret, but rather an affirmation: yes, I’m on the brink of losing it.
You see, dear child, I am at my wit’s end for several reasons. First and foremost, I have asked you countless times—let’s say approximately 78—to remove your dirty socks from the kitchen counter. Yet those brown, crusty remnants remain in the very space where we prepare and consume our meals, not to mention engage in activities that ideally occur far away from such unpleasant items.
Moreover, I recently discovered a puddle of urine on the toilet seat—an unfortunate consequence of your failure to lift the seat before using it or, at the very least, clean up after your visit. Don’t feign ignorance; I’ve seen you observe your own waste before. Remember that time you were leaning over the toilet, fascinated by the bubbles in your pee? Yes, I remember that too. So please, grab a piece of toilet paper and take responsibility for your mess.
Additionally, I have repeatedly requested that you close the door—over 1,267 times, if I’m counting correctly. Instead, it stays wide open, inviting every fly and mosquito in the vicinity, while the electric company undoubtedly chuckles at our predicament.
The incessant “but why not?” that follows every “no” I utter is grating, reaching a pitch that only our canine can understand. Your competitive streak with your sibling regarding tattling has escalated to an Olympic level, and your wrestling matches often end with tears. I have also asked you 26 times to complete basic hygiene tasks like brushing your teeth, combing your hair, and—please, for the love of all that is good—putting on clean underwear, yet here we are, well into the afternoon, and none of these tasks have been accomplished.
The family room harbors a dubious smell, likely emanating from dog feces or possibly urine—though I can’t be sure. Is it the couch? The carpet? At this point, I’m at a loss. My own thoughts are drowned out by the chaos, and I haven’t enjoyed a single moment of peace for nearly a decade.
You might think I frequently lose my composure, but let’s review the times I’ve managed to hold it together. When you decided to adorn yourself with permanent marker right before dinner or when you utilized the backyard as your personal restroom while the actual bathroom was merely fifty feet away, I remained calm. Even during that spontaneous indoor water balloon fight, I did not lose my cool—though it was a Herculean effort.
There are countless instances where I’ve chosen to stay composed, regardless of how understandable it would be for a mother to have a brief outburst. However, even the most patient individuals can only repeat “stop hitting your brother” or “why is there a toy in the dog’s bowl?” so many times before their sanity begins to fray.
In conclusion, yes, I am on the verge of losing it, and this, my dear child, is the reason why. Now, could you kindly do me a favor? Pick up those socks, close the door, and brush your teeth? I would greatly appreciate it. Because frankly, I need to indulge in some candy bars while hiding in the closet to prevent myself from truly losing it.
Resources for Further Exploration
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Summary
In the throes of parenting chaos, a mother articulates the frustrations that lead to her breaking point. Despite her calm demeanor in the face of childhood antics, the mounting responsibilities and messes are pushing her limits.
Keyphrase
parenting frustrations
Tags
[“home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”]