In my teenage years, I would have been horrified to be labeled a conformist. Back in the mid-1990s, like many others striving for a unique identity, I adorned myself with Doc Martens, colorful barrettes, and slip dresses, with vibrant locks dyed by Manic Panic. Ironically, in my quest for individuality, I was merely following a trend that everyone else embraced.
Fast forward two decades, and I find myself embracing the comforting identity of a conformist. What prompted this shift? The answer lies in the responsibilities of parenthood. Caring for children—feeding, bathing, and nurturing them—consumes a significant amount of time. While I once reveled in the endless pursuit of knowledge and research, my priorities have changed; I now prefer to spend my limited time on activities that offer rest and relaxation.
Rather than conducting my own exhaustive research on products, I turn to friends and family for recommendations. For instance, if my cousin has already selected a reliable booster seat for her child, it makes sense for me to trust her choice. When selecting a stroller, I relied on my friends’ experiences. Did they love the orange City Mini? That was good enough for me. Even my car choice was influenced by the preferences of those around me; seeing so many satisfied Honda CRV owners convinced me to go with the same model, and I opted for the same silver color that seemed to dominate my acquaintances’ driveways.
This practice of crowdsourcing extends to food, toys, and literature. My pantry mirrors that of my friends, stocked with Annie’s macaroni and cheese, and my children enjoy the same beloved toys from Melissa & Doug. We share favorite books, with Sandra Boynton being a common favorite. While some products work better for my kids than for others, our shared needs often lead us to similar choices in strollers, car seats, clothing, and more. We exchange valuable advice on what to buy and what to skip—such as the impracticality of a wipe warmer or the unnecessary expense of a pee-pee teepee.
Embracing conformity in parenting has proven to be not only easier but also soothing. The parenting journey is riddled with uncertainty, and the fear of making mistakes can be overwhelming. By adopting approaches that others have successfully navigated, I gain the reassurance of following a well-trodden path.
I no longer feel the necessity to stand out as a “special snowflake.” While I still express my individuality—now sporting a more natural hair color instead of the bright shades of my youth—I understand that I can be unique while still conforming to the shared experiences of fellow parents. After all, life is not about complicating matters unnecessarily; there’s no prize for swimming upstream.
I never envisioned that I would take joy in being a conformist, nor did I foresee myself as a stay-at-home mom in the suburbs. My aspirations once led me to New York City, where I envisioned conquering the world. While that dream shifted, I found true fulfillment in marriage and motherhood. As I grow older, my definition of success has transformed. I no longer crave the spotlight; my priorities now focus on ensuring my children’s safety, happiness, and well-being. Embracing the conformist tendencies of parenthood has become a vital part of that journey.
In conclusion, becoming a parent has led me to embrace a conformist lifestyle that prioritizes comfort and community over individuality. This realization has brought me peace as I navigate the complexities of raising my children, and I find myself increasingly at ease with this newfound identity.
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Keyphrase: Parenthood and Conformity
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