As a new mother, I must confess that I was not adequately prepared for the hurdles I would face upon returning to work. Although I had anticipated going back to my job after the birth of my first child, I had underestimated the complexities involved in balancing motherhood and a career.
I hadn’t fully grasped what it meant to place my child in daycare. The anxiety that accompanied leaving my baby in someone else’s care was something I had not anticipated. In my small town, the competitive nature of childcare options meant that I was already scouting for suitable facilities even before my baby’s arrival. The struggle of managing work commitments alongside sleepless nights was another surprise that came with being a postpartum working mom.
I quickly realized that I was entering a unique space at my workplace, predominantly filled with men and older women. I hadn’t considered how the personal challenges I faced at home would seep into my professional life. That makeshift sign on my office door that reads “Knock, please” does not imply permission to enter; it signifies that I am currently attached to a breast pump and racing against time to relieve my discomfort.
When invited to participate in a conference call, my mind often drifts toward my baby, as I scroll through photos and updates from the daycare on social media. Contrary to what you might think, I am not crying at my desk—at least not as often as I imagined I would. The extra padding in my bra? Those are breast pads, and let me assure you, by mid-morning, I could fill a cup with enough milk for your coffee break. So please, stop staring.
Taking on extra assignments while managing my pumping schedule is another challenge. Carrying around my breast pump and searching for a clean restroom is far from ideal; it’s quite the opposite. And while the idea of pumping in my car is tempting, it’s simply not feasible, as I learned when I attempted to power it through the cigarette lighter.
Yes, I feel overwhelmed by additional responsibilities, and yes, I do shed a few tears. The pressure to stay even a few minutes late can be distressing, knowing that each minute incurs a dollar fee at the daycare. I have also noticed that my clothes fit differently post-baby, but between work and childcare, shopping for new outfits has taken a backseat.
I know my baby may be refusing the bottle and fussing for my attention as I work. I also know that opting for takeout for dinner, despite my intentions to eat healthily, has become my reality, simply out of exhaustion. The mantra of “this too shall pass” rings true, yet it doesn’t make the daily grind any easier.
Each morning, I prepare to face another day, dropping my baby off at daycare before heading to the office. As I commute, I remind myself of the privileges I have, and I often seek out the nearest coffee shop for a much-needed caffeine boost to sustain me through the day.
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In conclusion, the journey of a postpartum working mom is filled with unforeseen challenges and emotional highs and lows. Each day brings new struggles, but also an opportunity to embrace the joys of motherhood and professional life.
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