As a mother, I take pride in being an engaging and playful presence in my children’s lives. My kids are well aware that I am usually game for activities like molding with Play-Doh, constructing elaborate Lego structures, painting, coloring, putting together puzzles, or diving into storybooks. We’ve created an army of snowmen and built numerous sandcastles together. I willingly include them in chores like baking, tidying up, raking leaves, and shoveling snow. And if the mood strikes, I might even join in a game of hopscotch or hide-and-seek. Our routine often includes outings to the park and regular visits to the library, and I can lose myself for hours blowing bubbles—well, at least until someone spills the bottle, which tends to happen sooner than I’d like.
However, amidst the laughter and playfulness that define our daily lives, there are times when boredom creeps in. As I work from home, my brain tends to shut down around 10 p.m., meaning I must take some of the kids’ daylight hours to focus on tasks at my computer. On particularly frigid days, we can find ourselves stuck indoors for extended periods. And let’s not forget the occasional technical issues with our beloved streaming services.
During these moments, my children often express their boredom in melodramatic fashion—full-body flails and exaggerated sighs quickly escalate to a whiny “paaaay with me” that can test my patience. While I know I’m not alone in this experience, I sometimes feel like the only parent who believes that boredom can be beneficial.
Social media often suggests that when kids are bored, it’s a parent’s duty to swoop in with creative solutions, be it constructing a dollhouse from a shoebox, turning the living room into a racetrack with masking tape, or dyeing rice in vibrant colors. In my earlier days as a parent, I tried to keep up with these expectations. I helped my toddler create oddly shaped owls and bunnies from paper bags and attempted to craft stained glass with tissue paper, although they never quite illuminated like I imagined. One holiday season, we built a gingerbread house from graham crackers—only to devour our creation before the frosting could set.
The irony in these so-called “boredom busters” is that they often feel more tedious for the adult involved. Parenting little ones already comes with a hefty dose of monotony; changing diapers, matching socks, and stirring pots take up a significant portion of our time. As a more seasoned parent, I’ve come to realize that I shouldn’t sacrifice my own enjoyment to alleviate their discomfort with boredom. When my daughters announce they are bored after our activities together, I respond with remarks like, “I’m sure you’ll think of something fun to do soon. You always do!” or “You’ve got a whole house full of toys and each other! I know you can figure this out!”
Then, I discreetly return to my work or sneak away to the bathroom with a book. Sometimes, I might find myself folding laundry but still questioning whether I’m a neglectful or unconventional mom for allowing my children to navigate their own boredom.
This hands-off approach, although challenging, has proven effective. Typically, within ten minutes, the whining transforms into cheerful chatter. Yet, their methods of self-entertainment can sometimes lead to more chaotic situations. For instance, I once returned from the bathroom to discover my youngest exploring an array of surfaces for sticker application, while my eldest rummaged through her closet for the perfect ensemble for a “royal vampire wedding.”
Despite the occasional mess, I believe it’s vital for children to learn how to entertain themselves, and as long as it doesn’t involve vacuuming up dyed rice, I’m sticking with this approach, even if I’m the only mom without a board filled with “Boredom Busters.”
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In summary, allowing children to experience boredom fosters their creativity and independence, while also providing parents with a much-needed break. Embracing this approach may lead to unexpected messes, but it ultimately cultivates valuable life skills for both children and parents alike.
Keyphrase: Parenting through boredom
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