When you’re a single mother, Valentine’s Day takes on a different meaning—one that doesn’t center around romantic gestures like chocolates and flowers. Instead, it often involves a last-minute scramble. Picture this: on February 13th, I’m at the local store, sifting through the leftover Valentine’s cards, desperately trying to find something suitable. I spend the night stuffing tiny envelopes with sugary treats like Pop Rocks and Sweet Tarts while also reaching out to my child’s teacher at 9 p.m. for the class list, since I can only recall five students out of twenty-three. Once the valentines are prepared, I then dive into Pinterest, hoping to discover a “healthy” snack that meets parental approval yet is appealing to kids. What seems like a simple idea often morphs into an hours-long project—think ladybugs crafted from chocolate-covered clementines or heart-shaped watermelons with grape cupids skewered on toothpicks. Welcome to my life! On a day celebrated for romance, I find myself constructing fruit sculptures instead.
As a single mother, holidays become redefined experiences. The teacher serves as a stand-in for the absent partner, sending home Valentine’s cards my child makes for every school event. Without those macaroni heart crafts glued to the fridge, my home would appear starkly empty, and my heart would feel similarly void.
But don’t feel sorry for me. I’ve come to terms with it. At this stage of my life, a romantic partner isn’t a priority. I’m not unattractive or physically unappealing. Someday, perhaps I’ll engage in a Valentine’s date. However, right now, I would likely be the most distracted date imaginable.
“Here’s a card. I didn’t have time to sign it because I was busy picking up library books, grocery shopping, making phone calls, preparing dinner, and cleaning out the guinea pig cage. By the time I reached the pharmacy, the only card left was in Spanish and addressed to someone’s grandmother—‘Feliz día de la de San Valentín abuelita!’ The candy aisle was bleak too, but I did manage to find a Smurfs Pez dispenser in the parking lot. So, Happy Valentine’s Day!”
I have my daughter with me all the time, apart from a few weekends yearly. Finding time to date feels as impossible as locating a lost Barbie shoe buried in a toy box or remembering what my body looked like before breastfeeding.
This year, instead of making dinner plans or searching for the perfect romantic card, I’ll be picking up my hyperactive child from school. She’ll have a bright pink frosting mustache, and for the next few hours, she will be coming down from her sugar rush, bouncing off the walls and pleading, “Just one more gummy heart, please, Mommy! I need it! I neeeeeed it!” After wiping her frosting-laden face, I’ll kiss her forehead and remind her to take things one day at a time.
While others post their romantic declarations on social media, sharing photos of lavish gifts and heartfelt messages, I’ll be watching my daughter finally drift off to sleep after the sugar crash. And in that moment, I realize I’ve never loved a valentine more.
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In summary, being a single mom on Valentine’s Day is a unique experience filled with challenges and sweet moments. While romance may take a backseat, the love for my child is the greatest gift of all.
Keyphrase: Single mom Valentine’s Day
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