At just under 9 years old, still navigating the third grade, you’re very much in your childhood. I envision a future letter about the remarkable woman I hope you will become, but today isn’t about that.
Instead, we need to have a serious discussion—no, not that talk. We’ll get to that in a year or two, hopefully after preserving your innocence a bit longer, especially if your friends aren’t introducing these subjects early.
Today’s Topic: Behavior and Sportsmanship
Do you recall last fall when I coached your volleyball team during that game at another gym? Do you remember how the opposing coach was quite unpleasant? That’s the individual I’m referring to.
It’s been some time, so perhaps you’ve forgotten his disrespectful actions toward the referee. How he belittled her authority with sarcastic remarks and exaggerated gestures to distract her from the game. You might have overlooked how he incited his players and their parents to mock her every time she made a decision in our favor, or how he reacted negatively whenever we scored.
You even asked me why he was so unkind, a question that has lingered in my mind.
Having participated in sports my entire life—from dance as a toddler to softball in elementary school and volleyball during my middle and high school years, I’ve also coached youth volleyball at various levels, including competitive teams. Therefore, I believe I have a solid grasp of what it means to guide young girls in sports.
That coach? He’s doing it incorrectly.
What I’ve always strived to impart to you and your teammates is the essence of good sportsmanship. At your age, it’s vital to learn about fairness, respect, and being a team player, just as much as it is to master skills like passing, serving, and moving on the court.
I’m not one of those parents who thinks sportsmanship means eliminating winners and losers. Recognizing that you cannot excel at everything is essential. You need to experience losing and learn to handle it gracefully; this is a critical lesson from youth sports.
You must learn to respect the people who facilitate the game: your coaches, teammates, and referees. They’re not there to make you shine; they make the game possible. Without referees, it’s not a sport; it’s merely practice. They deserve respect—not just from you, but also from coaches and parents alike.
When a coach yells at a referee for a perceived bad call, he demonstrates that winning is all that matters to him, overshadowing the lessons he’s meant to teach. He sets a precedent that it’s acceptable to disrespect authority figures, teaching you that belittling those who work hard for your benefit is a valid form of appreciation.
That’s poor behavior. If you remember nothing else, remember this: those who volunteer their time and effort deserve a fair amount of understanding for their mistakes. As you mature, the game will become more intricate, transitioning from basic skills to complex strategies, and referees will evolve with the sport, becoming knowledgeable facilitators.
But at this stage, for a referee volunteering her time on a Saturday to allow young players to enjoy volleyball? She deserves our understanding. It’s crucial to remember that there are no championships at stake, no scholarships to be lost, and no tournaments hinging on her decisions. The significance of her choices isn’t life-altering, and we are not going to treat it as such.
It’s all about perspective, my dear.
By now, it’s likely you’ve forgotten how that game concluded, and guess what? I’m not going to reveal it to you.
Because honestly, only someone truly self-absorbed would care about the win/loss record of a group of 8-year-olds.
Love,
Mom
Conclusion
In conclusion, it’s important to teach children about respect, sportsmanship, and the value of teamwork. These lessons extend far beyond the playing field and prepare them for life’s challenges.
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Keyphrase: Teaching Sportsmanship to Children
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