Dear Daughter,
As your mother, it is my sincere wish that you never have to read this letter. My hope is to instill in you a strong sense of self-acceptance before insecurities accumulate like bricks, weighing you down. I want you to always seek out the beauty in everything and everyone, especially within yourself.
I hope that no boy will ever make you feel pressured to change your appearance, and that no salesperson will convince you that makeup is a prerequisite for beauty. I never want to hear you say things like, “I’m too heavy” or “I’m not attractive.” I hope that self-criticism does not become a part of your daily routine.
This is your 28-year-old mom speaking to you just seven months after your birth, while I navigate my own relationship with my post-baby body. In theory, I recognize that I still look okay. I remind myself that my body is beautiful for having carried you for nine months and for nurturing you since birth. Yet, every time I glance in the mirror, I feel disheartened. On particularly rough days, I feel utterly defeated.
I have always struggled with insecurities regarding my appearance. Before becoming pregnant, I could rely on quick fixes like crash diets or salon visits to boost my confidence. However, pregnancy has a way of revealing vulnerabilities. No outfit can conceal a weight gain of 15 (20? 25?) pounds, and no lotion can erase the stretch marks etched into my skin.
To be honest, I am worn out by my own insecurities. It is exhausting to compare myself to others; there will always be someone who appears prettier, younger, or simply better. There’s always a mom who seems to have it all together.
I worry that one day you will notice how I frown when I step on the scale or how I sift through countless outfits to find one that flatters my figure. How can I teach you about beauty when I am grappling with my own acceptance?
In this vulnerable state, I reflect on what I wish to teach you about beauty and the female form. As your mother, I view this as one of my biggest responsibilities in raising you, my precious daughter. You may not realize it, but your innocent admiration helps me dismantle my negative self-talk. You see me as someone extraordinary, and I intend to use that as a foundation to build my self-esteem. One day, when you ask about weight, beauty, imperfections, and insecurities, I want to respond with honesty and love.
I hope you embrace life fully—never missing out on moments simply because you feel you “don’t look good.” I encourage you to try sports, martial arts, or dance. Build sandcastles in your swimsuit, savor the delicious fried chicken your father lovingly prepares, and don’t stress if the scale shows an extra pound. Accept compliments graciously and believe in their truth. These are the things I am learning for myself right now, and I want to teach you through my journey.
If I ever need to share this letter with you, I hope it serves to illustrate that not every woman feels confident in her body. I hope you’ll find the strength to empower those around you. Always strive to appreciate the beauty in others; instead of competing, uplift them, as you are helping me rise above my insecurities.
With all my love,
Mommy
This piece was originally published on December 17, 2015. If you’re looking for more insightful content, check out our other blog posts about home insemination and fertility, such as the at-home intracervical insemination syringe kit. You can also explore comprehensive resources on pregnancy at Healthline.
Summary
In this heartfelt letter, a mother shares her hopes and fears with her daughter regarding body image and self-acceptance. She reflects on her own insecurities and the importance of teaching her daughter to embrace beauty in herself and others. The letter emphasizes the need for women to uplift each other and find joy in life beyond superficial appearances.
Keyphrase
self-acceptance in women
Tags
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