Navigating the transition between indoors and outdoors can be a significant trigger for my family. While we manage reasonably well once we are settled inside or outside, it seems that the moments spent crossing that threshold lead to my emotional unraveling. Unfortunately, this is also when the neighbors are most likely to hear me express my frustrations. Here are 13 reasons why they refer to me as “that irritable mom.”
- “Where are your shoes? Why aren’t they on? Yes, you can put them on by yourself. No, you’re not a ‘little baby.’ Come on, we’re running late. Give it a try, and then I’ll assist you. No, that was not a good effort. PLEASE PUT ON YOUR SHOES!”
- “Why didn’t you use the restroom five minutes ago when I asked? Now you’re just going to have to hold it.”
- “Where is the baby? Did you leave him somewhere? Are you playing hide-and-seek? WHERE IS THE BABY? Oh, there he is. WHAT ARE YOU EATING?”
- “Did you remember to brush your teeth? No? Well, I guess they’ll just rot away.”
- “You’re only telling me about the permission slip now? The field trip is today. Where is it? Well then, I suppose you’ll have to search through the trash for it.”
- “No, you cannot run outside without your shoes! It’s 40 degrees! I said no. ARGH, I SAID NO!”
- “Are you playing a game called ‘Who Can Whine the Loudest’? Because this sounds disturbingly like a jazz rendition of frustration. Okay, please stop, that’s a horrible noise.”
- “Oh, is that a permission slip? For today? And you need $10 for lunch or a packed meal? Great, I have no cash. Okay then. I’m still calm.”
- “Oh, today is picture day too? And when was the last time you had a bath? THIS IS JUST FANTASTIC.”
- “Alright, let me set down the groceries while I unlock the door. Sweetie, can you prevent your brother from trying to remove everything from the bags? That’s a glass bottle. Hang on. No, put that down. I SAID PUT THAT DOWN.”
- “I know, I’m hungry too! Give me a moment to prepare dinner. Oh, you found a candy bar in my purse? I was actually saving that for…”
- “Honey, you’re looking a bit unwell. Let’s get you to the bathroom. Oh dear. It’s alright, sweetie. No, don’t play in your brother’s vomit, please. Step away for a second. I’m trying to clean… I SAID STEP AWAY FROM THE VOMIT.”
- “Let’s see who can be quiet the longest—YOU JUST LOST.”
The reality is that once we are safely inside, shoes off and groceries stowed away, all is well. Similarly, once we are securely outside and on our way, everything is quite lovely. It is just that transitional phase, where neighbors can witness my parenting skills on display. Some of them seem a bit questionable themselves—maybe one will offer me a Quaalude or at least a candy bar. I could definitely use one right about now.
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Summary
The challenges of parenting often peak during the chaotic moments of transitioning between inside and outside, leading to vocal frustrations that neighbors can easily overhear. Despite the stress of these moments, once settled, the atmosphere becomes much more peaceful.
Keyphrase: “irritable mom parenting”
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