I recently shared a candid post on social media expressing my reluctance to embrace the beloved Pumpkin Spice Latte (PSL). I half-expected to face severe backlash, perhaps even a loss of my online privileges or a forced relocation to witness protection. My message was simple: “I just attempted my annual PSL, and I’m afraid to say I still don’t understand the hype.”
To my surprise, I discovered a community of fellow non-enthusiasts who also harbor a distaste for the pumpkin craze. It turns out we’re not alone in our skepticism; there are many who share our sentiments and speak out against the overwhelming pumpkin phenomenon.
This brings us to a critical juncture: you either fully support the pumpkin movement or you’re hoping for its swift decline. While I welcome constructive dialogue, I must first air my grievances.
Let me make it clear: if you are in favor of pumpkin-flavored everything, you are undoubtedly winning this seasonal battle. I envy those who relish the multitude of options available to them right now. As a devoted chocolate lover, my choices seem woefully limited during this time of year.
Consider my recent mid-September errands as a case study:
Stop 1: Coffee Shop
Starbucks is undoubtedly the epicenter of pumpkin-flavored offerings. I braced myself for the usual routine, knowing that I would request the one beverage that isn’t a PSL. Today, the barista announced, “Alex? Your grande NOT PSL is ready.” This announcement was met with stunned silence and gasps from the line of PSL enthusiasts, eager to get their seasonal fix.
Stop 2: Bagel Shop
It’s relatively difficult to ruin a bagel, especially in the NYC area. As I waited to be served, I overheard a conversation between a mother and daughter debating pumpkin bagels versus plain ones. “Maybe pumpkin bagel with pumpkin cream cheese?” The sheer quandary they faced was a testament to the pumpkin obsession that seems to have taken over every food option.
Stop 3: Grocery Store
At Trader Joe’s, it felt like I had stumbled into a pumpkin utopia. The shelves were overflowing with pumpkin-themed products: Pumpkin Butter, Pumpkin Pancake Mix, and even Pumpkin Dog Treats. I longed for the arrival of peppermint season to escape this overwhelming pumpkin wave.
Stop 4: Medical Facility
While in a doctor’s waiting room, I overheard a man excitedly discussing his discovery of Pumpkin Spice M&Ms. I was left incredulous. Why tamper with something as classic as M&Ms?
Stop 5: Online
Upon returning home, I opened my computer to find Pinterest inundated with pumpkin-themed recipes. From Pumpkin Cheesecake Crepes to Pumpkin Pie Martinis, it became evident that the pumpkin takeover is relentless.
It’s no wonder that apples, once the star of fall, have been left in the dust. They were the traditional autumn favorites, but now they seem overshadowed by the pumpkin craze.
In closing, I offer an insincere congratulations to the pumpkin supporters. Enjoy your moment in the spotlight, but before long, the PSL will fade, and I will be indulging in my beloved peppermint bark.
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Summary:
This piece explores the overwhelming popularity of pumpkin-flavored products, contrasting it with the overlooked appeal of apples during the fall season. It humorously critiques the pumpkin obsession while expressing a longing for more chocolate options.
Keyphrase: pumpkin spice latte critique
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