How Parenting Is Guiding Me Towards Self-Love

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Updated: March 12, 2021
Originally Published: September 19, 2015

New parents often hear that the love they have for their child is unparalleled and transformative. It’s a sentiment that resonates deeply with anyone who has experienced parenthood. The affection we harbor for our children is pure and fulfilling. Personally, I’ve never experienced a love as profound as the one I feel for my son.

The mere thought of sending him out into a world that can be harsh and unforgiving fills me with dread. As parents, we feel our children’s pain as if it were our own. We yearn to shield them from harm and poor choices, yet we recognize that life’s ups and downs are essential for growth. We understand that we cannot protect them indefinitely. Our role is to be a source of guidance, equipping them with the resilience and tools necessary to face life’s challenges. Central to this is instilling in them a sense of confidence and self-love.

However, how can we impart these qualities to our children when, at some point, we may have neglected to cultivate them within ourselves? How can I nurture a son who values himself if I struggle to do the same? What if I could embrace self-love as fiercely as I love him? How would my life transform if I applied the wisdom I would offer him?

These questions have lingered in my mind recently. I came to a tough realization: I have tolerated situations that I would never want my son to endure. While I appreciate who I am, I’ve become complacent in prioritizing others over my own needs.

What am I doing to change this? I’ve started by asking myself a pivotal question: What would I want for my child? I deserve that same level of love and respect.

The first time I posed this question, it hit me hard. Imagining my son facing the struggles I’ve endured was painful. I have been trying to escape an unhealthy relationship for years, and everything suddenly fell into place. What would I advise my son? I would encourage him to walk away without looking back because he deserves better. That’s exactly what I’m finally doing for myself.

We often receive valuable advice from others, yet we tend to overlook it. However, when we connect emotionally with that advice, it can be transformative. By visualizing my son in my shoes, I’ve gained clarity. I’m learning to value myself just as I value him.

Assessing my life through the lens of what I would want for my child compels me to prioritize my well-being. It enables me to model the behaviors and make choices that align with the lessons I wish to impart. Gradually, I’m evolving into a better version of myself, knowing that my son is observing and learning from my actions. The most profound way to teach our children about love and respect is to embody those principles ourselves. We must discover our strength in order to raise strong individuals.

The next time you face a challenge, I encourage you to ask yourself this single question: What would I want for my child? Navigating life guided by genuine self-love may not lead us to the exact destination we envision, but it will undoubtedly steer us in the right direction.

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In summary, embracing self-love not only enriches our lives but also sets a positive example for our children. By asking ourselves what we would want for them, we can begin to prioritize our own needs and foster a healthier self-image.

Keyphrase: self-love in parenting
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