I find myself embracing a structured approach to parenting, which comes as a surprise given my previously easy-going nature. Before becoming a mother, I was known for my adaptability and willingness to go with the flow. However, motherhood has transformed me into someone who values routine and consistency.
From the moment my first child, Liam, was born, I adhered to a schedule that began when he was just two weeks old. A well-meaning friend gifted us a book that advocated for this method, and in those early, sleep-deprived days, I clung to any guidance that promised relief. At that point, I would have agreed to any plan, no matter how extreme, if it meant I could catch a few more hours of sleep.
In reality, we often strayed from this rigid timeline. For instance, Liam would wake up at 6:15 a.m. instead of the anticipated 7:00 a.m., prompting a frantic reshuffling of our entire day to accommodate his needs. We would adjust nap times and bedtimes, attempting to ensure a prompt 7:00 p.m. bedtime. Looking back, it’s amusing to recall how stressed we were over minor deviations from the schedule, despite the fact that children often have their own rhythm. My sister-in-law, a pediatrician, remarked that these schedules primarily serve to occupy parents while their child naturally learns to sleep.
Thanks to our adherence to this schedule, Liam was a good sleeper from a young age, perhaps due to his calm temperament or the structure we provided. This success reinforced our belief in the importance of firm naptimes and bedtimes. I became particularly adamant that he nap in his crib at home, refusing to schedule activities that interfered with this routine. The same went for our second child, Noah, who followed a similar pattern.
Travel poses a particular challenge for us. We have two children who frequently experience motion sickness, so planning a trip involves weighing the potential enjoyment against the likelihood of car sickness and the subsequent clean-up. Additionally, hotel stays are often disrupted by sleepless nights, especially since Noah tends to wake up screaming in the middle of the night. After considerable deliberation, we often opt against trips, despite invitations from family and friends.
As a result, we frequently decline evening gatherings that coincide with our children’s bedtime routines. We carefully plan our travel around their sleep schedules, which can lead to missed opportunities. When we do travel, we prefer to stay in one place for an extended period, allowing us to maintain our routines.
Admittedly, I sometimes feel disheartened by this rigid approach. Writing this, I realize I may come across as unadventurous and dull. In my pre-parenting days, I delighted in spontaneous trips and last-minute adventures. However, my focus now is on ensuring my children are well-rested and comfortable. While spontaneity may not be feasible at present, I hold onto the hope that future years will bring more flexibility. A dear friend with older children reassures me that travel will become easier as they outgrow the demanding infant and toddler phases.
In conclusion, my journey as a structured parent has been a series of choices aimed at maintaining a healthy, predictable environment for my children. Although it may seem stifling at times, this approach is currently what works best for our family. As I look forward to the day when we can embrace spontaneity again, I remain optimistic about the adventures that await us in the years to come.
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Summary
In summary, while my parenting style has shifted towards a rigid structure, this choice has been made with the well-being of my children in mind. The balance of maintaining a consistent routine versus embracing spontaneity is one that many parents navigate, and hopefully, as they grow older, the freedom to explore new experiences will return.
Keyphrase: Structured Parenting Approach
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