“Don’t hesitate to use a nipple shield,” I advised a woman I had just met. “Cracked nipples can be incredibly painful, trust me!”
“Just a heads-up, you might see some very orange poop in the diapers,” I cautioned another new mother who was about to introduce sweet potatoes to her little one for the first time.
In moments like these, it’s often hard to distinguish between close friends and those I’ve just met. The shared struggles of new motherhood can create unexpected bonds almost instantly. Typically, I wouldn’t divulge such personal advice to someone I barely know, but when a fellow mother joins our breastfeeding group, it’s a different story. Welcome to the sisterhood.
This newfound closeness has led me to recognize two distinct types of friendships in my life. As I navigate my early 30s, many of my peers are also starting families. Two of my closest friends welcomed their babies within a year of my own, and it has been a joy to share this journey with them. There’s no need for extensive vetting — I already know their strengths, and now we can seamlessly add parenting discussions to our conversations. These are what I call ‘friends who are moms.’
Having friends who truly understand that movie night now begins after the baby’s bedtime is invaluable. They send out invitations that proudly state, “Babies welcome :)” Our children are not seen as obstacles; rather, we adapt together. These ‘friends who are moms’ have essentially taken up the same hobby at the same time, and we enjoy it collectively.
On the flip side, I’ve also encountered a new category: ‘mom friends.’ These are women I might not have connected with under ordinary circumstances, yet our shared experiences of motherhood have brought us together. While they are undoubtedly delightful individuals, I often find myself discussing little Caden’s favorite bedtime story or his latest naptime routine without knowing much about his mother. Our connection is predominantly through our children, making her simply ‘a mom friend.’
Fortunately, the line between these two categories isn’t rigid. Several ‘friends who are moms’ started out as just fellow breastfeeding mothers. Over time, I’ve discovered their passions through social media posts and articles they share. By engaging in conversations about their careers and personal lives, they become more than just fellow parents in my eyes.
I anticipate that my network of ‘mom friends’ will grow as my child begins to make her own friends. I’ve heard that birthday parties can be a unique experience for parents. I’ll have to sharpen my small talk skills and be mindful of sensitive topics. Eventually, playdates will evolve into friendships for my daughter, and ‘mom friends’ will transform into occasional mentions like “Sarah’s mom.”
For now, I find myself discussing breast creams and diaper contents with women I’ve just met. This peculiar intimacy among ‘mom friends’ develops surprisingly quickly. We are all yearning for adult connection and reassurance that our parenting experiences are valid, leading us to seek solace in shared struggles. While these situational friendships may feel less profound than my deeper connections, they are equally essential.
In conclusion, navigating the landscape of motherhood introduces new types of friendships that can be both rewarding and challenging. Whether bonding with ‘friends who are moms’ or forging new connections as ‘mom friends,’ the journey is enriched by the shared experiences that come with parenting.
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Keyphrase: Mom Friends vs Friends Who Are Moms
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