By: Emma Peterson
Around two decades ago, my father shared a piece of wisdom that has shaped my understanding of independence: “If you want something in life, you need to put yourself in a position to provide those things for yourself. Don’t rely on anyone else.” This advice came as we washed the dinner dishes together, and I was likely expressing a teenage desire for something trivial. Unbeknownst to me, my father was imparting my very first lesson in feminism: embody independence, take charge of your own life, and shape your destiny. Crucially, he affirmed his belief in my capabilities, emphasizing that I deserved respect and opportunities just like anyone else.
As parents, we are continuously teaching our children—whether through our actions or words—what is significant, what is not, and how we perceive ourselves and the world. These lessons often emerge subtly, so it’s vital to be aware of our values and ideals. By doing so, we can ensure that these principles are the ones our children absorb.
My family may resemble a scene from a 1950s sitcom (with my partner working while I care for our young children), but I wholeheartedly identify as a feminist because I believe in equality. Even though I have two sons and no daughters, it remains crucial for them to understand feminism and the dynamics of gender equality in society. Gender inequality affects everyone, and it’s our responsibility to combat the stereotypes and biases our children encounter from an early age. We must embed the lessons of feminism and equality deeply into our family’s fabric, allowing them to surface naturally—whether during playdates or while putting away dishes.
While there are plenty of resources on feminist lessons for daughters, I realized I needed to create a tailored list specifically for my sons, addressing the challenges I anticipate they will face. Thus, I present to you 25 vital lessons in feminism for boys:
- Feminism is about equality, not femininity.
- Being a boy doesn’t preclude you from being a feminist; enjoy your interests without compromising your beliefs.
- It’s acceptable to express emotions, including crying, as long as it is done respectfully.
- Build friendships with girls—they are valuable allies.
- Interests are not gender-specific; girls can enjoy trucks and superheroes just as boys can love tea parties and princesses.
- Phrases like “like a man” or “like a girl” are meaningless; ignore them.
- Strength and sensitivity can coexist beautifully.
- Your anatomy does not grant you privilege; it makes you human.
- Hold doors open for everyone—not due to outdated customs but simply as a gesture of kindness. Good manners matter.
- Physical beauty is fleeting; true beauty shines from within.
- Acts of kindness, like paying for dinner or giving flowers, should not be transactional; they are simply thoughtful gestures.
- Engage in sexual activities only when you are fully ready, not out of peer pressure.
- Consent is crucial: “No” means no, silence means no, and only an enthusiastic “yes” is acceptable.
- Surround yourself with those who encourage your best self and be cautious of those who wish to change you.
- Equal effort deserves equal pay—this principle is foundational.
- Your identity is not limited to your gender, job, or possessions; focus on being kind, brave, and respectful.
- Decisions about last names in marriage are personal and should not dictate love or commitment.
- Providing for a family extends beyond finances; emotional support and care are equally important.
- Choose childcare solutions based on what’s best for your family, considering various factors that may evolve over time.
- Men can perform household tasks like anyone else; domestic responsibilities are not gendered.
- Apologizing is a strength, not a weakness; it displays courage and accountability.
- Recognize and appreciate your privileges while advocating for those who lack them.
- Cultivate empathy, compassion, and sensitivity in all interactions.
- Differences among people, including genders, should be celebrated rather than generalized.
- Embrace these lessons for the sake of fairness and respect, understanding that they can contribute to a more equitable world.
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In summary, imparting these lessons not only fosters an environment of equality and respect but also empowers the next generation to challenge societal norms and build a more equitable future.
Keyphrase: Lessons in feminism for boys
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