Parenting is undoubtedly exhausting, but the fatigue that comes with raising a tween is a unique kind of weariness. Unlike the all-consuming exhaustion associated with toddlers—where every moment is filled with endless questions and physical demands—this stage brings a different set of challenges that often feel heavier.
I find it difficult to admit my fatigue, particularly because my daughter is no longer a small child; she is eagerly counting down to her teenage years. She is capable of dressing and bathing herself, and the thought of snuggling up in bed with me at night would likely disturb her. Not only can she prepare her own meals, but she often does so without needing my assistance.
This tiredness transcends mere physical exhaustion. It stems from emotional burdens—worries that revolve around challenging topics such as peer pressure, social media risks, and the harsh realities of adolescence that affect kids her age. These are conversations that have become increasingly necessary but also deeply concerning.
The fatigue I experience now is not from the barrage of toddler inquiries, but rather from the weight of what remains unspoken and the worries I hold for her unvoiced struggles. As a parent, it’s heart-wrenching to acknowledge that there are difficult questions and social injustices I cannot rectify, and painful experiences that I cannot simply kiss away.
Every parent hopes to create a safe and nurturing environment for their children, yet there comes a moment when we realize that we are not always able to shield them from the complexities of life. Despite my instincts to intervene, I understand that sometimes the best course of action is to listen and provide support, even when it feels emotionally draining.
It was a revelation on my daughter’s twelfth birthday that our time together as a parent-child duo was two-thirds complete. This realization infused our remaining years with a sense of urgency I hadn’t anticipated. There’s so much left for us to experience together, yet I am acutely aware that the teenage years may not rank high on her priority list. I often reflect on the mistakes I’ve made throughout her childhood and wish for the opportunity to amend them—not for my sake, but for hers.
I recognize how fortunate I am to witness my child navigate this complex and beautiful stage of life. The teenage years may not bring relief from the challenges of parenting; instead, they often escalate them. An older colleague once shared with me during my pregnancy, “You’ll never sleep the same way again,” a statement that has proven profoundly true as I now comprehend his own exhaustion.
The adage that “the bigger the children, the bigger the problems” resonates deeply. Although I hope the worries will lessen, I realize that they likely will not. As Toni Morrison wisely noted, “Grown don’t mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child,” and the essence of that connection remains regardless of age.
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In summary, parenting a tween presents a distinctive set of emotional and physical challenges that can be overwhelming. As parents, we strive to support our children through the complexities of adolescence while grappling with our own concerns and exhaustion, all while cherishing the moments we have left together.