In contemporary society, the term “boomerang child” typically refers to a young adult who returns to live with their family, often for financial reasons. However, what if these adult children never leave home in the first place? This scenario might be termed a “failure to launch,” highlighting their struggle to achieve independence. As noted by journalist Laura Bennett in her article, “Understanding Today’s Young Adults,” the millennial generation has delayed traditional milestones of adulthood, such as completing education, moving out, achieving financial stability, marrying, and starting families. Perhaps we should introduce a new term for those opting to remain at home to complete their post-secondary education: “Nestlings.”
My partner, Jake, and I faced considerable challenges during our college years, particularly since we decided to start a family early. Balancing child-rearing with educational expenses is no small feat, often leading to significant student debt—debt that we are still managing today on our modest incomes as educators. Consequently, we aimed to provide our children with a different experience. When our kids were just 5 and 2, we made the proactive choice to invest $400 each month into a college savings plan—the Future Scholars Fund. This fund would ultimately cover four years of college education. In retrospect, it was a prudent decision; our children, now 24 and 21, have avoided student loans and can focus solely on their studies without the burden of juggling full-time work.
Not only do our children benefit from this early financial planning, but their continued residence with us has also played a significant role in their success. Yes, our adult children have not yet left the nest, and whenever I share this information, I find myself justifying our choice.
1. We Have Established a Clear Agreement
Our understanding is straightforward: as long as they are making academic progress, they can reside with us. We cover their essential needs—housing, food, insurance, and communication—while they are responsible for personal expenses like clothing, personal care items, and leisure activities. Although life can throw curveballs, we remain committed to our arrangement. A survey by Global Financial Insights revealed that 90% of young adults aged 18 to 24 report significant stress related to economic uncertainty and underemployment. By continuing to support them, we believe they can devote their full attention to completing their education without the added pressure of financial obligations.
2. Cultural Norms Support Multigenerational Living
As highlighted by cultural analyst Maria Gonzalez, many collectivist cultures—such as those found in American Indian, Asian, Hispanic, African, and Middle Eastern communities—emphasize the importance of extended family networks. It is common for families in these cultures to share living spaces across multiple generations. While our household consists of just two generations, we maintain strong ties with our parents, who live nearby. We believe this familial closeness strengthens our bonds and fosters a supportive environment, which is especially vital in today’s often fragmented family dynamics.
3. Financial Considerations Are Key
Let’s break down the numbers: a college student working 30 hours a week at $9 per hour would earn approximately $1,080 monthly. Rent for an apartment in our area typically starts at $550, and this figure doesn’t account for additional expenses like utilities, food, and internet. Balancing work and a full course load is challenging, which leaves limited options for students: they could take on debt, require financial support from parents for a separate living arrangement, or reduce their course load to accommodate longer working hours. For our family, none of these alternatives are viable, as they contradict our goal of ensuring our children graduate without debt.
4. Our Commitment to Their Future
Jake and I are dedicated to providing our children with the advantages we lacked, including a debt-free college experience. We recognize that any sacrifices we make now will benefit them long into the future. The current economic landscape is daunting; many experts argue that the next generation may face worse financial conditions than their parents. For instance, economist Jane Smith posits that today’s youth will likely experience stagnant wages and limited job growth, making our efforts to support them all the more crucial.
I anticipate criticism suggesting that we are hindering our children’s independence by allowing them to stay at home. However, both of our children are independent, self-sufficient individuals who simply share our address. We’ve designed their living space upstairs, complete with bedrooms, a bathroom, and a separate lounge area, all of which they maintain. They come and go as they please and have developed their own routines. In many respects, Jake and I already feel like empty nesters. While this arrangement may not suit everyone, it works well for us. Perhaps the collectivist approach has merit, and perhaps our family is not as unconventional as some might think.
In conclusion, allowing our adult children to live with us is rooted in a mutual agreement, cultural practices, financial realities, and a commitment to their future success. This arrangement has fostered independence while providing the support necessary to navigate today’s economic challenges.
Keyphrase: Adult children living at home
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