While waiting in line at the grocery store, I often find myself bombarded by magazine headlines proclaiming: “Ways to Revitalize Your Marriage!” More often than not, they focus on revamping your sex life, keeping your partner engaged, or preventing monotony in the bedroom. I can’t help but interpret these as “how to enhance your marriage.” However, the dreaded “m” word—marriage—rarely gets a mention.
After perusing a few of these articles, it becomes glaringly obvious: these writers likely don’t have children.
- Leave Romantic Notes: The idea of placing flirty notes around the house sounds delightful—until you realize you have kids who can read. Let’s be real: “I love it when you take out the trash” doesn’t quite capture the essence of romance, does it?
- Lingerie in the Kitchen: The suggestion to wear lingerie while cooking dinner is laughable. How on earth would that work with kids running around? Even if you wait until they’re asleep, you’d need a blanket nearby to cover up quickly when little feet come padding down the hall.
- Role Play: One article suggested pretending to be strangers at a bar. I can already hear my husband chuckling at the idea. The likelihood of us engaging in playful banter is slim; he’d probably end up at the pool table while I awkwardly waited at the bar.
- Setting the Mood: The recommendations for candlelight dinners, rose petals, and soft music sound enchanting in theory. However, with my tendency to create chaos around candles, I’d be more likely to start a fire than ignite romance. And by the time the kids are asleep, my husband is likely to be asleep on the couch, leaving me with a cleanup job involving rose petals—basically the glitter of the floral world.
- Bathing Together: The notion of taking a bath together is idealistic, but the reality of our tiny tub makes it seem more like a game of human Tetris than a romantic getaway. How would we even both fit comfortably without one of us leaning awkwardly?
- Showering Together: While sharing a shower might sound intimate, it often ends up being a chilly ordeal, with one person hogging the hot water. Plus, in our single bathroom, the inevitable urge to use the toilet during our romantic interlude complicates matters.
- Acting Out Favorite Scenes: While trying to channel some movie magic sounds fun, our recent family film selections have been far from sexy. “Release the baby!” from The Croods is not exactly what I’d call a romantic line.
Clearly, these tips seem tailored for couples without children, or perhaps for those rare moments when the kids are away. For most parents, the idea of rekindling romance often translates to waiting until the kids have grown and moved out—or, worse, until grandchildren come to visit.
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Summary
Parenting presents unique challenges that can make traditional marriage advice seem irrelevant. The romantic tips often shared in magazines don’t account for the realities of family life, leaving many parents feeling overwhelmed. Finding moments to connect often requires creativity and flexibility, particularly when kids are in the mix.
Keyphrase: marriage advice for parents
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