There’s a part of me—my inner teenager—that might feel a twinge of embarrassment over my current taste in music, but honestly, I don’t. There was a time when music significantly influenced my identity—a period marked by black velvet chokers, dark nail polish, and hairstyles reminiscent of cat ears. The young woman I was would be shocked to learn that two decades later, I’d be a parent, shuttling my child to swim lessons while joyfully blasting the Top 40.
In my youth, I could recite every lyric from The Smiths, adorning my school supplies with quotes that defined my persona. Yet, now I find myself singing along to Rihanna and Maroon 5 without an ounce of irony or regret. If Morrissey knew about this transformation, he would undoubtedly disavow my allegiance.
Music as a Defining Characteristic
Music was once my defining characteristic. In high school, we meticulously selected our lunch tables based on musical preferences. I’d never dream of sitting at the Metallica or country music table. I was too cool for that; I occupied the Jane’s Addiction table, where we scoffed at those who enjoyed Paula Abdul or Bobby Brown. How could they not recognize the brilliance of Robert Smith compared to those pop icons?
In my twenties, I was equally judgmental. I wouldn’t consider dating someone with poor musical taste; Hootie and the Blowfish was a definite deal breaker. Seriously, how could anyone enjoy Jon Secada and still expect me to view them as a serious partner? My ideal match would have appreciated the Beastie Boys, but only the sophisticated sounds from “Paul’s Boutique,” not the more mainstream “Fight For Your Right to Party.”
Shifting Musical Tastes
Looking back, I can’t believe I once placed such importance on these matters. I didn’t even know what the Top 40 stations were, as I exclusively tuned into obscure college radio—the stations that lingered near the bottom of the dial. Now, however, my car radio is permanently set to the Top 40, and I have no idea if college or alternative stations still exist. Were they merely a relic of the 90s? Does anyone even listen to the radio anymore?
I’ve become so out of touch that it has taken me 25 years to develop an appreciation for Nirvana. During their heyday, I dismissed them as too mainstream; I was all about Sonic Youth.
Eventually, music ceased to define my identity. I attempted to cling to my former relevance, hoping to embody the hipster mom stereotype, but I realized I was already far from that. Now, I find joy in artists like Shakira and even Jennifer Lopez. Yet, I occasionally long for my old tastes. I tried to watch this year’s Coachella, only to discover that I didn’t recognize any of the performers, and then my child opted for Disney Junior, which I ultimately chose. The last album I bought was Arcade Fire’s The Suburbs, and I can’t recall the last time I listened to it. The Decemberists sit neglected in my iTunes library.
A Rite of Passage into Motherhood
This seems to be a rite of passage into motherhood. Moms are often stereotyped for their questionable musical choices. I recall my own mother jamming to Basia on the treadmill while I cringed in disbelief. I couldn’t fathom how she could dislike the Violent Femmes, but now the tables have turned, and I find myself in a similar position.
However, my sense of coolness—or lack thereof—means little to me now at 41. I embrace this newfound musical freedom. Aging has instilled a sense of security within me, erasing the need for a specific playlist to characterize my life. Music, which once served as a classification tool, now holds little weight regarding who I am or who others are. I no longer have the time for pretentious music snobs; my priorities have shifted to more meaningful pursuits. Surprisingly, I’ve even discovered a few country songs that I genuinely enjoy. Take that, teenage me.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to enjoy some Taylor Swift. Afterward, I might indulge in some classic 70s yacht rock. Christopher Cross, here I come!
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In summary, I have embraced a more relaxed attitude towards music and its impact on my identity. This acceptance has led to a greater appreciation for various genres, transforming my relationship with music into one of enjoyment rather than judgment.
Keyphrase: “Musical Preferences and Identity”
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