Updated: July 23, 2020
Originally Published: May 18, 2015
Research suggests that children ask around 250 questions daily. Multiply that by my three kids, and it becomes clear why I often experience a twitchy eyelid and occasionally sneak a glass of wine into the shower.
Most of their inquiries are straightforward and require little thought—like, “Why are you yelling at that driver if he can’t hear you?” Well, because he’s driving like a total jerk! However, some questions leave me stumped, such as, “Why do we have eyebrows?” I can always rely on Google for that.
Yet, there are a few questions where I know the answer, but articulating it in a kid-friendly manner feels nearly impossible. These are the types of answers that adults take for granted, but they can lead to a cascade of further questions that might spiral into complex issues—potentially resulting in years of therapy.
Here are 20 such questions, along with the responses I keep to myself:
- Where are the cows on that truck going? To a better place, I suppose.
- Why do you and Dad share a bed? Honestly, I’m not sure. Most nights, I’m too worn out from dealing with life’s chaos to think about it.
- What is this song about? Wait, what? How long have I been daydreaming? Is that a lake? Is it still Tuesday?
- Why do you wear mascara? Because I often tell you to embrace who you are, yet I struggle with it myself.
- Where was I before I was born? The same place those cows are headed, wherever that may be.
- Why do we need to make our beds? Because it was expected of me when I was your age. Now, please finish your breakfast.
- Anything that involves time measurement. Oh boy, I don’t even… it’s like… I don’t know how to explain it, just trust me, it’s an HOUR! frantically points at the houseplant We’ll go to the zoo in two episodes of Sesame Street and one of Dora, okay?
- How did that baby get in her tummy? … Who wants ice cream?
- How did I get out of your tummy? Well, it was a bit of a miracle.
- Why is it thundering? Is that thunder? I thought my headache was just getting worse.
- Why do you forget things? Because I’ve done a lot of fun but brain-cell-killing activities in my life.
- Why are you staring at your phone? Because I’m trying to avoid phone calls.
- What is a tampon for? My body has a strange way of giving me news I didn’t ask for.
- Does everyone die? Yes, and that thought is frightening, and it should scare you too.
- Why do we have to visit the dentist if we’re all just going to die? Because I want you to have nice teeth for your future partner.
- Why don’t you have a job? Because you and your siblings require constant attention, which is a full-time job in itself.
- What are hot dogs made of? Ingredients best left undiscussed.
- If fast food is unhealthy, why do we go to Taco Bell? I hope that by the time you’re grown, there will be a miracle pill to undo all the fast food damage!
- Why do people drink beer? Because no matter how much laundry you finish, there will always be more.
- How does a shooting star grant wishes if it’s just a rock? Because the world is full of magic, even when it’s not real.
Despite the challenges, this is what I cherish most about children: their endless curiosity and the fresh perspectives they bring that shape their understanding of the world. I just hope they don’t learn on the playground why Mommy and Daddy share the same bed.
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Summary
Navigating the myriad questions from children can be a daunting task for parents. From curious inquiries about life and death to the mundane aspects of daily living, parents often find themselves at a loss for words. Embracing this curiosity can lead to meaningful conversations and deeper understanding, while also providing a chance to reflect on the complexities of adulthood.
Keyphrase: parenting questions
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